Feeling a little lazy? Yeah, me too.

If you bought Skate 2 and don't feel like taking the time to actually play and just want the content to open up like a cheap hooker, then you can purchase an unlock code. Awesome, right?

There's a new Skate 2 DLC unlock code available for purchase off the Xbox Live Marketplace. The download is called "The Time is Money Pack" costs 400 MSP and it will "unlock all locations, skaters and gear that can be earned by playing through Skate 2's career and online modes."

I don't even play the games for the sake of the conquest... I just want the end result. This DLC is perfect for me. If only this paragraph would have written itself.

The first DLC for the highly popular Grand Theft Auto IV has been priced at long last. The biker-gang expansion (The Lost and the Damned) will cost you 1600 MSP, which is roughly $20.

For that $20, you are buying yourself between 10 and 20 hours of new gameplay in Liberty City; that gameplay will include new missions, more GTA music, more weapons and a new criminal crew.

Here is the latest batch of screenshots from the PS3, Xbox 360 and PC versions of the new Ghostbusters game. It is due to hit shelves on June 16th and so far everything is looking good. I really can't imagine the game being put off too much longer since Dan Akroid in the game looks... well... just like Dan Akroid. In fact, it is a scary resemblance. 

Tomb Raider: Underworld is getting some DLC to give its loyal gamers some more one-on-one time with the delicious Lara Croft. The downloadable content is called Beneath the Ashes, and will be the first of two new downloadable levels available on February 10th. The second downloadable level is called Lara's Shadow and will follow on March 10th.

The new gameplay levels will be featured exclusively on the Xbox Live Marketplace for the 360 and will cost you somewhere between $5 and $100 dollars. I haven't narrowed it down yet.

The first DLC, Beneath the Ashes, will send Ms. Croft back to Croft Manor where she discovers previously unseen caverns and crypts. ... if you're asking me, you'd think that the owners of said mansion would realize there was a powerful and ancient cavern beneath their house. Maybe they just thought it was a wine cellar.

Sidenote: this DLC will include six new costumes and deliver an additional 125 achievement points.

What scares the hell out of you? Well, Deep Silver knows if you don't. The answer? Snow and monks. An in order to stimulate the morbid centers of our brains that really enjoy scary crap, they made Cursed Mountain; CM is a Wii title that'll take you up a cursed mountain with some scary monsters. The reason I'm so interested in it is that the graphics are pretty epic for the Wii.

How are they epic? Well for one, as you climb higher on the mountain you'll be able to see down to every place you've already been in an uber-realistic display of graphical genius.

Eric Simmons, an expert mountaineer and the main character of CM, climbs this huge mountain called Chomolonzo. Now C-Mountain (what I will call it from here on) is a sacred mountain in the Himalayas that is full of monks and undead people and ghosts and whatnot. It isn't your typical Saint Bernard-with-liquor kind of mountain experience. Now Eric is climbing up C-Mountain to discover where his lost brother is.

Enjoy the screenshots of this snowy adventure by Deep Silver.

Woohoo! Gears of War 2 fixes! Granted, I haven't played the game quite enough to realize every little failing of the digital Marcus Fenix and his buddies but I'm glad to hear the announced ‘big patch' is live.

"[The update] addresses a large number of multiplayer exploits and issues as well as makes some balancing tweaks, includes a couple of new features and even adds seven new DLC-based achievements," said the executive producer of Epic Games, Rod Fergusson.

There are some new Xbox 360 achievements thrown in there as well. Four of them will require the installation of the new Flashback Map Pack. This map pack can be downloaded for frizzle (free) if you have a code that's in the new package for the Gears of War 2 game. If you are buying GoW2 secondhand, you must pay $5 to get the map pack (and thus the new achievements).

ANNNNNND here is the Title 2 Update ladies and gents:

Improvements

Title Update 2 makes these new improvements:

* Changed Annex games to use execution rules, to prevent players from leaving DBNO opponents on the ground to bleed out.

* Made Horde waves count toward the "Party Like It's 1999" achievement. Each wave is counted as one round.

* Added the ability, during Submission ga mes, to see the flag's final destination by using Tac/Com.

* Increased the frequency of most of the toasts for in-game achievement progression.

* Added achievement progression numbers to the War Journal.

* Added 7 new DLC-based achievements worth 175 points (progress toward them starts after Title Update 2 is applied):

--"Skeletons in Your Closet" (20 points): Complete waves 1 through 10 on all Flashback Map Pack maps in Horde (any difficulty).

--"Trial by, and on, Fire" (20 points): Complete waves 1 through 10 on all Combustible Map Pack maps in Horde (any difficulty).

--"More Mystery, Less History" (15 points): Win a multiplayer match on each of the 5 Flashback Map Pack maps (any mode except Wingman).

--"The Roof! The Roof! The Roof" (15 points): Win a multiplayer match on each of the 3 Combustible Map Pack maps (any mode except Wingman).

--"Bound by a Shared Past" (15 points): Win a Wingman match on each of the 5 Flashback Map Pack maps.

--"Forged in the Fire" (15 points): Win a Wingman match on each of the 3 Combustible Map Pack maps.

--"Annex: Now with Execution Rules" (75 points): Win an Annex match on each of the Flashback and Combustible Map Pack maps (Public only).

Exploit Fixes

Title Update 2 fixes these possible exploits, where under certain circumstances:

* A player could melee or grenade tag through certain walls.

* A player could equip a shield and a two-handed weapon simultaneously.

* A player could make their shield invisible.

* A player could become invisible.

* A player could do a "super" mantle or "kung fu flip," flying high into the air.

* A player could gain unlimited ammo with the Lancer Assault Rifle.

* A player could fire while roadie running (also known as "crabwalking").

* A player could pick up a weapon while sliding into cover.

* A player could walk forward while firing a deployed mortar.

* A player could force an opponent to be stuck in the down-but-not-out (DBNO) position.

* A player could prevent other players from picking up a heavy weapon.

* A player could pick up a dropped meatflag without having to knock him down.

* A ragdolled player could be killed without ever going DBNO.

* A player could roadie run while firing the Scorcher Flamethrower.

* A player could get stuck while evading, though they could continue shooting in any direction.

* A player could concuss themselves under the stairs on the River map.

General Fixes

Title Update 2 fixes these other issues as well:

* An issue with client-side hit detection of the Gnasher Shotgun. The fix makes the shotgun more reliable in high-latency situations.

* An issue where players could have shotgun or Boomshot rounds fire into the ground when shooting from the hip.

* A split-screen issue where one player transitioning to the death battle camera disrupted input from the other player.

* An issue that could cause players' Look sensitivity to be changed to their Zoom sensitivity while zooming in, zooming out, and firing.

* An issue that could cause players to get stuck if they tried to pick up a heavy weapon while firing the shotgun at the same time.

* An issue where players could become stuck if they kicked over a shield while ragdolled from a smoke grenade.

* An issue where bots were unable to kick over a shield that was planted backward.

* An issue where players who quit during voting didn't show up in the end game stats, which meant other players couldn't easily provide negative feedback on them.

* An issue where players couldn't chainsaw enemy meatshields if the meatshields were already damaged.

* An issue where some players would not see the animation of a meatshield being chainsawed.

* An issue where players could not chainsaw an opposing team meatshield in a game type that doesn't allow respawns (for example, Warzone and Execution).

* An issue where a player partway through the act of raising or lowering the chainsaw did not transition into a duel when attacked from the front with a chainsaw.

* An issue where occasionally a player waiting to respawn could not respawn when repeatedly hitting the left trigger to switch cameras.

* An issue where some teammates couldn't communicate between rounds in games type that don't allow respawns, because dead team members were left in the dead radio channel until the next round started.

* An issue where a DBNO player could be seen as standing if knocked DBNO while reloading the mortar.

* An issue where a player joining a Private Xbox LIVE game in progress from another specific type of game could potentially lose HUD functionality.

* An issue on the Flood map where a player's dying from Imulsion did not trigger a death message or penalize the player as other environmental deaths did.

* An issue with Guardian games where if the leader is the last player killed on a team, the round may not end, due to the respawn timer.

* A campaign issue where the gamer picture would not be awarded when the game is completed on Insane.

* An issue where a player would continue to fire the flamethrower and damage other players if that player was knocked DBNO while firing it.

* An issue that could cause a player to get stuck while moving and quickly attempting to aim the mortar at the same time.

* An issue with Horde games where clients didn't receive the "waiting for host" message after they failed a wave.

* A Horde split-screen issue that could cause a team to get â€"2 billion in score, which when posted to the leaderboards looked like +2 billion.

* An issue where dead players may not show up in the metadata for multiplayer photos.

* A system link issue where if a multiplayer match and a co-op game were hosted at the same time on the same LAN, neither could be joined.

* Additional miscellaneous bug fixes.

Balancing

Title Update 2 makes these balancing changes:

* Made planted proximity grenade mines much easier to shoot off the surface they're planted on, by giving them 50 percent less health.

* Set grenades to respawn less frequently. When a player picks up grenades from a spawned location, a new set of grenades does not respawn until the previous grenades have been used.

* Increased the penalty to rank for players who quit Public Xbox LIVE matches early.

* Buffed the flamethrower to have stopping power (to slow a charging enemy) and to cause a chainsaw interrupt (to force the opponent to lower a revved chainsaw).

* Removed the ability to instantly shoot coming out of a roadie run.

* Added additional spawn protection to prevent proximity grenade mines and chainsaws from killing a player within 5 seconds after spawning.

* Balanced grenade spawn cycling on the Hail map so that both teams have equal access to both types of grenades.

It's hard for me to get excited about the new Final Fantasy 13 countdown on Square Enix's retarded site- want to know what? Here, I'll make a list:

1. It's been done so many times before, the whole ambiguous countdown scheme. (Can you say BUNGIE? Good. Because that's who I'm referring to.)

2. I won't bee seeing any FF goodness until 2010 so instead of enthralling me, it's giving me blue balls.

So that leaves me and every other FF fan in North America and Europe silently hating FF13's site, which is sporting the damn counter that ends on Wednesday at 8 a.m. PST. Unless Square Enix is going to announce that Final Fantasy 13 is going to be released in 2009 in the States covered in honey and chocolate, I have a feeling I will be sorely disappointed.

"The countdown has begun," reads the site. "A new vision will soon be revealed to the world. Register now to ensure you're there for the unveiling."

Ok, c'mon. You're just waggling a steak in front of a very angry and very rabid dog.

On January 26th, LBP is getting a pretty nice update and after that the PSN will be once again regularly updated with LBP DLC (yay acronyms).

January 26th -- Chinese New Year costumes (free, available for 10 days only)

January 29th -- Groundhog Day costume (available one week only), God of War mini pack, Kratos costume

February 5th -- Valentines Day mini pack (available for 2 weeks only)

February 12th -- Ape Escape costume, Toro costume

February 19th -- WipEout costume kit

The dates and prices aren't quite confirmed yet for the North American PSN, so don't get too excited over this piece of information.

Oh sigh. Why do bad things happen to good people?

n-Space's Winter is a game that reminds me of the creepy-crawlies I got back in the original Resident Evil days. The small, dark corridors filled with monsters make me as twitchy as the first lumbering zombie I ever heard. It's obvious from the video that the game could have been headed for greatness.

But there is a tragic ending to this great introduction to Winter - Winter is a lost Wii game. n-Space introduced it in 2007 and received a positive response, but Creative Director Ted Newman said that no matter what the initial response was, the game "got hung up with the sales and marketing groups."

And... that's it. I know, I'm a little confused, too. Why would n-Space let this treasure go to waste? Where are the decent publishers in the world?!

Family Ski: World Ski & Snowboard by Namco Bandai is just the perfect family ski and snowboard game. Obviously. Cute Miis, skiing, snowboarding and penguins just can't be topped. But I just have one question: isn't this game technically called "We Ski and Snowboard"? I know that "world" sounds like "we" but... I'm a little confused regarding the news floating around the interweb.

These are the top selling games for 2008 and I can't help but just think "Um. Huh?" for a couple. ... Okay the first. Wii Play? Wii Play was that popular that it beat out Mario Kart, Call of Duty and Grand Theft Auto? I'm not even sure what kind of games are included in Wii Play. Table tennis? Donkey punching? Some sort of illegal cocaine usage? It has got to be something good for that many people to buy it like hotcakes. Check out the list below for the top 5 selling games of 2008.

Top-Selling Games In The U.S. For 2008
(All versions combined. Units in millions)

1. Wii Play 5.28

2. Madden NFL '09 5.25

3. Grand Theft Auto IV 5.22

4. Mario Kart w/ Wheel 5.00

5. Call of Duty: World at War 4.63

Sony officially released the 2.60 of the PS3 firmware- hooray!

The new Photo Gallery is just awesome and the number of sorting options and unique little quirks make the download worthwhile. The firmware 2.60 update will also add DivX 3.11 support to the PS3.

Also, if you're a non-PSN members you will now be able to browse the PS Store to get demos and other free downloads. Finally, PlayStation has acknowledged the freeloaders! I have been waiting for this time to come for a long, long while.

In order to celebrate the launch of the eagerly awaited Killzone 2, Sony is releasing a special bundle that combines the game and a (of course) PlayStation 3. The 80GB PlayStation 3 complete and FPS will cost 299.99 GBP in the UK... which is a pretty good deal seeing that the PS3 costs around that anyway.

The UK's release of the game is 2/27/2009 so you can expect to see the bundle appearing on shelves sometime around then as well, although there hasn't been a confirmed date.

Once and for all, the heavy metal version of Guitar Hero (Guitar Hero: Metallica to be exact) has a release date. I can barely wait to take Lars place and be a true masochist and play on Expert + difficulty.

The band's official site was updated, saying that Guitar Hero: Metallica for the Xbox 360 and PS3 will be released in North American stores on March 29. The international release of the game, and also the Wii and PlayStation 2 versions, should be released in early May.

Guitar Hero: Metallica will feature 28 songs from the Metallica, but it will not be limited to just one band. Other bands you can expect to see in the track list are Alice in Chains, Slayer, the Foo Fighters, Machine Head, and Queen. 

Wheelman by Midway Games, starring a realistic Vin Diesel, has been delayed.  The game is now to be released on March 20th, but if you're jonesing for some Vin you can get the game's demo. Midway promised to release said demo on the Xbox 360 and PS3 sometime before March 20th.  

There is no word regarding the PC demo; there might be one before the game ships, there might not be. Oh, the suspense.

You might need an extra drum pedal to rock out to Metallica... luckily if you pre-order Guitar Hero: Metallica at Gamestop you can get a FREE one. Schwing!! You know as well as I do that those blast beats on Metallica tracks require some serious pedal...ing.

The second pedal comes with a "splitter" that'll allow the drum pedal to be hooked up to a World Tour drumkit. Thank God for game developers thinking ahead. 

Xbox.com just posted seven new Gears of War 2 achievements... could this be in preparation of a big title update? (Um. Yes.) The achievements won't be unlocked until the patch actually releases, but they will add an extra 175 points to the Gear's 2 Gamerscore total. The points are targeted towards achievements made in multiplayer mode on the Flashblack and Combustible.

Skeletons in your Closet (20G) - Complete waves 1 through 10 on all Flashback Map Pack maps in Horde (any difficulty)

More Mystery, Less History (15G) - Win a multiplayer match on each of the 5 Flashback Map Pack maps (any mode except Wingman)

Bound by a Shared Past (15G) - Win a Wingman match on each of the 5 Flashback Map Pack maps

Trial by, and on, Fire (20G) - Survive first 10 Horde waves on Combustible Map Pack maps as a team

The Roof! The Roof! The Roof... (15G) - Win a multiplayer match on each of the 3 Combustible Map Pack maps (any mode except Wingman)

Forged in the Fire (15G) - Win a Wingman match on each of the 3 Combustible Map Pack maps

Annex: Now With Execution Rules (75G) - Win an Annex match on each Flashback and Combustible Map Pack map (public matches only)

Io Interactive has just revealed their new game that they are intending to release in the Fall of 2009 on Nintendo Wii, Nintendo DS, Xbox 360, PC Games for Windows and PlayStation 3 ... Mini Ninjas!

Hiro is the world's smallest ninja and hero and he is working towards restoring peace in a world that is chaos. Battle evil Samurai using your Kuji magic, ninja skills and the special skills of your Mini Ninja friends.

"Mini Ninjas represents a truly special game for us," said Niels Jørgensen, General Manager of Io Interactive. "The whole team is very excited about it, because it is unique in so many ways. From the art style to the characters and the depth of the game - Mini Ninjas has that exceptional appeal, which is sure to keep both young and old very entertained."

Flower, a poetic game that isn't quite a game (confusing, I know) has recently received a concrete "shelf" date. Thatgamecompany's President, Kellee Santiago, says that we should expect to see Flower available for purchase in the US and European PSN stores February 12th.

The game itself is very unique and beautiful, but I'm not sure if the everyday gamer will be content with it. Check out the screenshots to see if you like Flower. 

Capcom let loose the information that a demo for Resident Evil 5 is going to be appearing on the PSN on February 2. There hasn't been officially confirmation of this yet- the only reason it seems shady is that the 2nd is on a Monday and usually the PSN updates on Thursdays.

Luckily, though, for 360 owners the demo is going to be arriving much sooner. The Xbox 360 version of the RE5 demo will be available starting January 26. But there will be no need to bicker over which demo will be superior; each console will receive the same one. The demo features two levels that can be played solo, split-screen or online co-op.

Good news: The demo is being released both this month and early next month.

Bad news: The real game isn't being released until March.

Think of Football Superstars as a Second Life for jocks (or just people who want to be jocks). It will be the very first virtual football world and already it has over a quarter of a million registrations.

In Football Superstars, players can make a virtual footballer as the online version of themselves. But making a character is just the beginning - you can play 3v3 up to 11v11 matches, gain new skills and specialize in a playing position.  Pretty much, you have free reign in this open world to do anything you can to improve your footballin' skills.

Phil Booker, the CyberSports Head of Sales and Marketing, said:

"Breaking the 250,000 barrier is an incredible achievement. It's fantastic to see the results of the combination of strategic partnerships that we have set up and our marketing strategy using PPC, SEO and viral marketing paying off with such a large number of registrations. We've had great support from DBD Media and Infectious Media amongst others, and with their continued support, the registrations will continue to grow and Football Superstars will be the success that our hard work promises."

The upcoming racing game, RACE Pro, is to feature three different GT Classes: GT Pro, GT Sport and GT Club. If you are RACE Pro literate, I'll break this down for you. The GT Pro is the fastest of the three classes, followed by GT Sport and GT Club. What qualities make the difference between each of the three classes are levels/types of tuning on engines, how much you can improve your chassis, and tire and wheel sizes.

RACE Pro attempts to be as realistic as possible. There isn't just some magic button that you'll use to improve the cars. You will be able to use tools to balance performance such as air intake restrictors and restrictions to the aerodynamic package.

Read below for detailed descriptions of the cars:

1. GT PRO

a) Saleen S7R

Saleen Inc. is an American manufacturer based in Irvine, California. Saleen manufactures high performance limited-edition sports cars as well automotive equipment. Steve Saleen, a former race car driver, founded the company Saleen Autosport in 1984, the same year the company introduced the first Saleen Mustang. The Saleen S7R has had much success in GT racing all over the world.

• Key Stats

Straight from the Call of Duty Headquarters - Treyarch is going to open up Call of Duty: World at War's Nazi zombie co-op playlist to everyone on PlayStation Network and Xbox Live. Before this, you had to have completed the single-player campaign.

If you don't know what Nazi zombie co-op IS (if you haven't beaten the game yet), it is a game mode where you and up to four other players fight off waves of Nazi zombies from an old, abandoned house. The game is scarier than it sounds; it takes place on a misty moor (field?) and the multiple holes you have in the house keep getting overrun with zombies.  You can barricade the openings but only temporarily; those zombie bitches hammer them down every couple of minutes.

Also, Treyarch is giving out double the EXP this weekend. It has already started and will continue until the end of the weekend (early on Monday?).

Valve and their Steam digital download service know how to make a lazy gamer weep (especially one that loves MMOs).

A honking huge library of Sony Online Entertainment titles is now available on the digital download service. These games include the ever so popular EverQuest and EverQuest II collections, Vanguard: Saga of Heroes, Pirates of the Burning Sea, EverQuest Seeds of Destruction and EverQuest II The Shadow Odyssey. 

But wait! There's more!

As sort of an "act now!" offer, Pirates of the Burning Sea, Vanguard: Saga of Heroes, EverQuest Secrets of Faydwer and EverQuest II Rise of Kunark are being sold at discounted prices during the first 10 days of availability.

Are you already tired of saving up your money for taxes? Yeah, me too. Debt only feels natural. Therefore, I'm going to spend my extra cash over at GOG.com.

GOG.com is having an Epic Loot 15% off sale this weekend classic RPG games. If you want to get the 15% of these titles, just type in "PROMO1" at checkout (each of these titles will end up being under $10). Easy as pie.

Arx Fatalis

Fallout

Fallout 2

Fallout Tactics

Gothic

Invictus: In the Shadow of Olympus

Lionheart: Legacy of the Crusader

Sacred Gold

Stonekeep

The upcoming Resistance: Retribution for the PSP is a third-person shooter that will hopefully fill in some holes in the Resistance timeline and storyline.  It will even connect with Resistance 2 to add even more features to the gaming experience.  The box art has finally been released as well as information regarding a pre-order bonus.

If you pre-order the game from Amazon, Best Buy, GameStop or Game Crazy, you will get a voucher code for downloading the Resistance: Retribution demo two months before the game hits retail.

Two months! Just think of all of the time you can act superior around your friends... oh gosh, I'm tearing up.

Demos are made for whiny, impatient people like me.

Today, Warner Bros. Interactive Entertainment announced that the single player demo for the highly anticipated F.E.A.R. sequel, F.E.A.R. 2: Project Origin, will be released on January 22 for both the 360 and the PS3. Also, if you're a PC gamer, you can go to What is Fear.com and download the Windows version on the very same day.

But if you're an elitist Qore subscriber, you have the ability to download the PS3 version of the demo now. Pigs.

The story of F.E.A.R. 2: Project Origin picks up right before the ending of the original F.E.A.R. puts you in the perspective of someone in the Special Forces squad. That squad is on a mission in the city of Auburn that gets caught in a disaster; a massive explosion occurs there and was caused by Alma, the mysterious girl from the first game who unleashed her destructive paranormal powers in the city. And that's pretty much it.

Feel screwed already, don't ya?

Remember how we said that Wii Music was lame and that no one wanted it so therefore they bought Rock Band instead? Well apparently I was wrong and I didn't realize that consumers don't know what they want, they just buy crappy games.

The 2008 NPD numbers are in, and Nintendo ended up with five of the top 10 best-selling games (that's half, kiddies). For some ungodly reason, the retardedly stupid Wii Music was a... success. It sold over 865,465 in North America. Granted, that number alone didn't guarantee it a spot in the top 10 games but it's absurdly close (35^th best selling). With that game alone, Nintendo made over $41 million.

865,465 in one continent? Dear God.

Users like simplicity. People should know this by now but it is exemplified by the Wii and PlayStation 2 versions of Rock Band outsold Rock Band and Rock Band 2 on the other systems last year. !!! The versions of Rock Band for the Wii and PS2 were extremely simple; key features were left out, there was no online play/DLC, no character creation and the graphics were shoddy (aka- it was Guitar Hero-ish).

According to data gathered and analyzed by the NPD group, the Wii version of Rock Band was the franchise's best-selling SKU last year- selling over a million units with the PS2 version right behind. The success of the games go as far as Rock Band Wii and PS2 being the 29th and 31st best-selling games of the year, respectively.

The Xbox 360 Rock Band sold just under 800,000 units, Rock Band 2 on Xbox 360 sold just under 600,000 units and Rock Band 2 on Wii (released at the VERY end of the year) sold over 150,000 units.

It looks like the Nintendo crowd responded to having the lame-ass Wii Music and wanted something more.

Recently, a Michigan woman almost killed her dog while playing Wii Sports. Yes. She almost killed her dog while playing with her Nintendo Wii. As Kathy "Bloodthirsty" White played Wii bowling with her daughter, she took a mighty backswing and then struck her poor pup, Ozzy, in the temple. She thought that she killed him instantly. (Does she think that she is the bionic woman?)

When she saw her dead(?) dog on the floor, she had the good sense to call her neighbor. The neighbor, as any good neighbor would, performed mouth-to-mouth resuscitation and revived the dog.

Ozzy was then taken to the real vet. The vet told the pet owner that the poor, innocent dog had brain swelling due to cardiac arrest and extreme negligence when operating a Nintendo Wii (ha ha). Watch the video below.

The Square Enix President Yoichi Wada let it slip to Reuters this week that the highly anticipated Final Fantasy XIII will be released in Japan sometime in 2009. Also, the planned release for overseas on the PS3 and the Xbox 360 is for April of 2010. I know I should be skeptic and expect 20 different delays, but I can't help it. The 2009 prediction for Japan was originally mentioned at Reuters as early as August of 2008, but it's nice to see that they are staying on schedule so far. Oh, how it gives me hope!

I think I just peed from excitement.

Ahh, Left 4 Dead, the zombie horror-survival game that is so close to my heart. L4D has provided many, many gamers with a thoroughly enjoyable multiplayer experience, but even the golden game can have some issues. Valve is releasing a large patch for the PC (and the Xbox 360 in weeks to come); the PC patch will be available for download through the glorious Steam.

Below are the patch notes, but before you get too giddy with excitement over patch notes I want to voice one little wish: THE XBOX 360 PATCH BETTER HAVE LEGACY CONTROLS. Okay that's all. Thanks. Patch notes below!

Patch Notes:

General

Fixed Survivors being able to climb surfaces marked for versus infected only.
Fixed a class of SurvivorBot bugs dealing with rescuing downed players.
Players can no longer grab ladders while flying through the air after a Tank punch.
Shooting near a car with an alarm that has already fired the alarm will no longer make chirping noises.
Improved loading time.
Fixed mini-gun physics exploit.
Fixed propane tanks (and other physics objects) causing players to fall through elevators.
Fixed rare achievement bug issues.
Fixed several map exploits.
Fixed various match making issues.
Fixed NAT traversal issues.

Versus Changes

Added HUD elements to show status of other infected players.
Changed color of infected player name in chat to red.
Fixed exploit where players could spawn infected bots
Fixed instance where a Survivor changing to the infected team would be attacked by infected bots.
Normalized special infected melee damage.
Made the following client commands cheat protected: "Kill" and "explode".
Fixed exploit where infected players could run away and teleport back to gain health.
Players can only change teams once per map.
Players can't change teams while other players are still loading.
Tank spawns at the same % through the map for both teams in versus mode.
Made the Tank and Witch spawn directly on the escape route.
Increased chance of getting the Tank or Witch.
Fixed team swap issue.

Hunter

Easier to pounce a Survivor who is meleeing.
Increased Minimum damage a Hunter pounce does.

Smoker

Fixed Smoker tongue tolerance.
Smoker now has to be killed or the tongue destroyed for the tongue to break.
Survivor's cannot bash someone off the tongue until the Survivor being pulled is paralyzed or hanging
Tongue attacks that fail to paralyze or hang a Survivor will use the shorter ability delay timer.
Fixed cases where the ability timer was not using the correct time.
Fixed case where you could point at a Survivor but not register a tongue hit
Fixed Smoker tongue not targeting and landing properly through PZ ghosts.
Smoker tongue does damage every second while dragging paralyzed Survivors.

Tank

Bashable objects now appear with a red glow.
Tanks hitting a car with an alarm disables the alarm permanently.
Tank frustration timer is only reset by hitting Survivors with rocks or fists.
Reduced autoshotgun damage against Tanks.

Witch

Witch spawns at the same % through the map for both teams.
Avoids spawning within a certain % of the tank.
Fixed an exploit where the Witch could be woken up and tricked into attacking Survivors.

Sumthing Else Music Works, Inc, and Microsoft Game Studios are releasing the Halo Wars Original Soundtrack that features the original music score from the new strategy Halo game. The soundtrack will be released 2/17/2009 at retailers or through digital download at www.sumthingdigital.com.

"For Halo Wars I wanted to write music that fit both the size of the story and its sense of discovery," said Stephen Rippy, the director and composer for Halo Wars. "Each of the various worlds in the game feels a little different; each of the main characters brings something to the mix. More than anything else, it was important that these tracks fit comfortably into the existing Halo universe. I hope they'll take the listener to some new places as well."

The Halo Wars Original Soundtrack will feature over 50 minutes music composed by Stephen Rippy. Rippy also composed the soundtracks for the Age of Empires series and Age of Mythology.  The second disc included with the soundtrack will be a DVD with nine additional bonus tracks, nine 5.1 mixes of tracks from the music disc, two cinematic trailers and one behind-the-scenes video.

Track Listing:

1. Spirit of Fire
2. Bad Here Day
3. Perspective
4. Money Or Meteors
5. Flollo
6. Just Ad Nauseum
7. Unusually Quiet
8. Flip And Sizzle
9. Put The Lady Down
10. Six-Armed Robbing Suit
11. Action Figure Hands
12. Status Quo Show
13. Part Of The Plan
14. Work Burns And Runaway Grunts
15. Freaked Out
16. Rescued Or Not
17. Best Guess At Best
18. One Problem At A Time
19. De Facto The Matter
20. Part Of The Problem
21. Fingerprints Are Broken
22. Out Of There Alive
23. Through Your Hoops
24. Under Your Hurdles
25. Insignificantia (All Sloppy / No Joe).

Now this isn't fair. The PS3 limited edition packaging for Resident Evil 5 in Spain, France and Italy is just downright badass. I'm hoping that in the states we'll get something just as dark and sexy but I can't help but feel a little antsy...

Playing retro games is in; Konami Digital Entertainment, Inc. announced that the 1996 GTI Club+ classic arcade-style racing game is available for download via the PSN. Multiplayer allows up to 8 players to compete in a free-for-all or team-style race.

The choice of car you have in GTI Club+ will be from a collection of high performance European hatchbacks (think Mini Cooper and Volkswagen Golf). These cars will help you speed through European streets on singleplayer, multiplayer or even through a game of Bombtag (a free-for-all that includes explosives).

Oh and by the way- you can enjoy all of this fast-paced racing action in HD. Schwing.

Thank God. If a week didn't go by without new clothes for my avatar in the New Xbox Experience I might fucking flip. Like, I might take out a shotgun and kill my neighbor's cow.

Enjoy the new duds, people.

Boys' Department:

Striped Polo Shirt

Striped Jacket with Polo

Checked Jacket with Polo

Open Neck Cardigan

Embroidered Pants

Suspenders with Hi Pants (Dress Up)

Girls' Garb:

Hacking Jacket (huh?)

Chinos with Belt

Rainy Day Boots

Scarlet Pumps

Lavender Polo Shirt

Oh, look! There is the Assault Rifle from Halo! Oh... but this is Fable II. Um. What?

If you bought and downloaded Fable 2's $10 Knothole Island add-on you can get your very own Spartan gun. If you've got a pure experience extract potion to trade you can get this rapid-fire rifle (that holds 24 rounds HMMM).

Well at least this makes me feel a little more tough.

Voila! The Rock Band 2 music store is now live, thank heavens. Not that I have Rock Band 2 or a Wii to speak of, but this is good news for everyone else. You can do everything you need to with the store (preview, purchase, download freebies). You can download songs, unless they are free, for 200 points apiece.

You might want to start buying SD cards for the Rock Band 2 downloads though. The Wii doesn't hold that many memory blocks and the songs are big downloads (when you go to purchase a song you'll be able to see how much room it'll be taking, which is a thoughtful feature).

Here is the full list of songs available for download now:

Pay to play

30 Seconds to Mars -- The Kill

All-American Rejects -- Move Along

Avenged Sevenfold -- Afterlife

Black Tide -- Shockwave

Blink-182 -- All the Small Things

Blondie -- Call Me

Boston --More Than a Feeling

Boston -- Rock & Roll Band

Disturbed -- Inside the Fire

Fall Out Boy -- This Ain't A Scene, It's An Arms Race

Jimmy Buffett -- Cheeseburger in Paradise

Lynyrd Skynyrd -- Simple Man

Metallica -- And Justice For All

Motley Crue -- Saints of Los Angeles

Muse -- Hysteria

Nine Inch Nails -- The Perfect Drug

Oasis-- Wonderwall

Papa Roach -- Time is Running Out

Paramore -- Crushcrushcrush

Red Hot Chili Peppers --Snow (( Hey Oh ))

Rush -- Working Man (vault edition)

Serj Tankian -- Beethoven's C***

Smashing Pumpkins --Zero

Stone Temple Pilots --Interstate Love Song

Stone Temple Pilots -- Sex Type Thing

The Offspring -- Hammerhead

The Police --Message in a Bottle

The Who -- Baba O'Riley

Weezer --Buddy Holly

Weezer --El Scorcho

Free to Play

88, The -- Sons & Daughters

Authority Zero -- No Regrets

Between the Buried & Me -- Prequel to the Sequel

Cab, The -- Bounce

Chevelles The, -- Get It On

Cocktail Slippers, The -- Give it to Me

Dealership -- Database Corrupted

Endeverafter -- I Wanna Be Your Man

Ghost Hounds -- Ashes to Fire

Hollywood Undead -- Young

Kutless -- The Feeling

Len Price 3, The -- If I Ain't Got You

Lesley Roy -- I'm Gone I'm Going

Opiate for the Masses -- Burn You Down

Semi-Precious Weapons -- Magnetic Baby

Shaimus -- Like a Fool

thenewno2 -- Crazy Tuesday

Tickle Me Pink -- The Time is Wrong

Underoath -- Desperate Times, Desperate Measures

X Japan -- I.V.

This Thursday (1/15/2009) there is supposed to be a U.S. PixelJunk Eden update. It is supposed to fix issues that some first-time gamers are experiencing with the "organic platformer." The patch should implement a "continue system" when you run out of time, a new control scheme, more time on the level clock and a better looking/feeling multiplayer camera. 

WOOHOO! New Castle Crashers DLC!

This week, the DLC will be coming to the Xbox Live Arcade this week for 160 ($2). I'm not too sure what it'll consist of, but I am betting that there will be new character and weapons. So it might not be a huge deal (it does only cost $2 by the way).

Clover was independently developed by Binary Tweed Ltd. and is a neat little puzzle-platformer. Although it looks to be a "Braid clone" it might be valuable without comparison. Talk to in game character, collect items and solve puzzles to plow in through the interesting (although slightly depressing) plot. Once released, you can purchase Clover for 400 MSP ($5). Expect to see it in the first quarter of 2009.

If you play Mirror's Edge on the Xbox 360 or PS3, you'll be happy to hear that DICE finally nailed down a release date for their Time Trial DLC. You can purchase and download the new content starting January 29.

The DLC includes nine races on seven different brand new maps. For $10 you'll get all of these surreal maps; they look a little crazy but fun nonetheless.

Bethesda released a patch today for Fallout 3 on all platforms. It is the same patch that the PS3 owners downloaded in December; there are various fixes for your Fallout 3 gaming experience (including keeping dead NPCs dead). Click here for the full patch notes.

But that's not all children! Bethesda announced that the first Fallout 3 DLC, Operation Anchorage, will debut on 1/27/2009.  You can buy the DLC for 800 MSP ($10). So why don't you join dear Three Dog in Fallout 3 and purchase that DLC, mkay children?

Today Deep Silver released new screenshots their round-based RTS game Mytran Wars for the PSP. Personally I'm not into RTS games too much, but it does involve war and explosions so it can't be that bad, right? Right.

The game takes place in the 23rd century on Earth with very few resources left. From the tension you can feel today with the oil situation, one could imagine the wars and fear created by having no natural resources left. A war breaks out (and seeing that it is the future) between the armed mech of different factions. You'll fight your battles in a multitude of 3D landscapes against AI or humans in different multiplayer modes.

The future, war, and robots... how isn't that good?

BEWARE! If you have gotten a Call of Duty 5 "2" Beta invite recently in your email, delete it. It is probably some horrible virus that will kill your first-born or computer. It hasn't been confirmed which.

Infinity Ward Community Manager Robert Bowling is warning the public against a fake Call of Duty 5 beta invite. The fake invite is an "exact replica" of invites sent our for the CoD4 beta so it is very easy to be deceived by the deceivers.

If there was a real beta out, believe me, you would know.

The developer of F.E.A.R. 2: Project Origin, Monolith, revealed the system requirements for its FPS sequel. Are you man enough?



Minimum System Requirements: 



*CPU: P4 2.8GHz (3.2GHz Vista)/Athlon 64 3000+ (3200+ Vista) 


*GPU: DX9-capable graphics card with 256MB (SM 2.0b). NVidia 6800 or ATI X700. 


*RAM: 1GB (1.5GB Vista) 


*Hard Drive: 12GB 


*OS: Windows XP SP2/Vista SP1 


*DirectX: 9.0c 


*Sound: DX9.0c compliant 


*Optical drive: DVD (boxed only) 


*Internet: Broadband 



Recommended System Requirements: 



*CPU: Core 2 Duo 2.2GHz processor family/Athlon 64 X2 4400+ (required for MP host) 


*GPU: Fully DX9-compliant graphics card with 512MB (SM 3.0). NVidia 8600 GTS or ATI HD 2900 XT. 


*Ram: 1.5GB 


*Hard Drive: 12GB 


*OS: Windows XP SP3/Vista SP1

*DirectX: 9.0c 


*Sound: DX9.0c compliant 


*Optical drive: DVD (boxed only) 


*Internet: Broadband (768kbit/sec upstream required to host 16 players) 



Spruce up your Xbox 360 Dashboard with a brand spanking new Braid theme that you can buy on Xbox Live Marketplace.

The theme costs 250 MSP(about $3 and some change); the game designer of Braid isn't too happy that:

"We want to make it free, but Microsoft doesn't like giving things out for free. But if you do buy it, you can be secure in the knowledge that you own one of the few Premium Themes that is not an advertisement -- there is no text in the Braid theme anywhere."

If you're looking to freshen up your Xbox Live play-list with a new face from the Marketplace, look no further than a new game by Twisted Pixel Games called The Maw.

The game will be released on January 21, 2009 on Xbox Live Arcade. You'll have to pay 800 MSP (about $10) for this beauty but it's worth the price; this downloadable arcade game was one of the PAX 10 Audience Choice Award winners and an IGF 2009 Finalist.

Josh Bear, the CCO and director, said, "We set out from the very beginning to create the most content-rich and impressive game that we could for ten bucks and 150 megabytes. There are over 900 animations, 1000 sound effects, 25 music tracks, 200 visual effects, and 150 models, making this an incredible value for your $10."

Your character Frank and The Maw (his big, toothy buddy) landed on a bright and colorful planet that is full of traps, puzzles and local life that prevent them from having a good, safe time. But by using The Maw and your brain you can make it safely through this hostile environment!

Ubisoft announced a new DLC pack for Shaun White Snowboarding (on both the 360 and the PS3). This downloadable content will cost you 400 Microsoft points and approximately the same dollar amount for the PS3, although that will be confirmed later.

What you can expect to get from your hard earned money is:

7 Pants
7 Coats
4 Tuques
4 Gloves
4 Boots
4 Goggles
14 Snowboards
2 Bindings
3 Backpacks 

Prototype is so beautiful... in a manner of speaking. The graphics look great. The game itself looks great, too. Who wouldn't want to be a superhero-ish monster that can terrorize a city? If I had the power tha main character did in Prototype, I'd be flinging semis at helicopters just for fun. (Which he might do.)

This weekend, Halo 3 gamers can double the EXP they earn with the Grifball Double EXP playlist. For every win you get, you get double the EXP. That's pretty sweet. I probably will be too busy paying off my Animal Crossing loan or reading dirty novels (since I'm a chick), but hey. Good idea anyway.

The limited playlist ENDS on Monday, January 12th at 2AM pacific.

So an interesting back-story the Wii remote has! Originally, the Wiimote was a concept designed for the Gamecube that would connect via an adapter (much like the Wavebird wireless controller would). I suppose since Nintendo knew the GC was on the way out, they just implemented it on a totally new system.

The funny part of this entire thing is the concept art. They thought of putting the Wiimote in the most ridiculous places. A bicycle? Teddy bear? A fucking helmet?

I'm not sure what these games involving would entail, but I'm glad to see that there wasn't a dildo-Wiimote combo.

Blizzard recently updated the Diablo III website with 5 new screenshots but I thought... hell... why not post them all? I'm just ambitious like that. The newer screenshots reveal a towering enemy, certain spells (buffs?), and fog-filled environments. So now that we have a plethora of screenshots, will we ever get the game?

Since there have been so many updates for the Xbox 360 in the past few months, you have to wonder if it will keep up like that. Will there be these huge bundles of data to download every few months or so? Xbox director Aaron Greenberg says more (smaller) updates may be more common:

"Some of the benefits of the design of the new interface is that we can add new channels, new content, new features on a more regular basis," he said. "It doesn't mean we won't group a bunch of these and do a big rollout, but I think you will see us do more regular updates and roll things out on a more regular basis."

Thinking about Final Fantasy XIII gets me a little hot. I'm not going to lie.

Our buddies at Square Enix have released 30 direct feed images from the game in their entire splendor. This game looks good. It seems like we have been waiting for a decade for a whisper of a rumor from S.E. regarding the new Final Fantasy.

So enjoy the screenshots... hopefully more information will be coming from their site soon (gameplay? release date information?).

You have got to be kidding me.

Engadget discovered something amazing. Something so amazing it scares me a little. What they have unearthed is a Pip-Boy prototype. The company that made this IRL Pip-Boy hasn't named it yet, no, but come on. A Pip-Boy is something that the survivors of a nuclear-holocaust wear in Fallout 3.

Because of the discovery of the Pip-Boy, I'd be watching out for several things. 1.) The company "Vault-Tec" to emerge 2.) global tension 3.) nuclear warfare 4.) mutants.

I'm just sayin'.

Whether you're getting the standard edition for $59.99 or the collector's edition for $79.99, Street Fighter IV is going to be a blast and a half when you play it. Street Fighter IV takes the fighting and gameplay from the original Street Fighter II and infuses it with Capcom's next-gen technology to make it a really bad-ass experience.

If you love nostalgia, you'll get a kick out of playing as Ryu, Ken, Chun-Li and Guile in a unique 3D environment. There are going to be newer characters in the line-up as well, such as Crimson Viper, Abel, El Fuerte, and Rufus.

The features for the new Street Fighter can be summed up as such:

3D environments and characters

Traditional "2D" Street Fighter six-button gameplay

Classic Street Fighter characters re-imagined for a new generation of gamers, including the original cast of Street Fighter II

New brawlers: female super-spy Crimson Viper, lucha libre wrestler El Fuerte, mixed martial artist Abel and more!

New special moves that go beyond any Street Fighter fan's wildest imagination, including Focus Attacks, Super Combos, and the revenge-fueled Ultra Combo system.

Amazing locations never seen before in a Street Fighter game

New gameplay elements provide challenges for both newcomers as well as the most seasoned Street Fighter pro.

Resident Evil 5 is on the brink of being released, and that horror beauty is just making me tense in anticipation. In order to feel better, I have been staring at these 5 new teasing screenshots for the past hour. Won't you do the same?

I know that if you're morbidly obsessed with the undead as I am, you are waiting on pins and needles for Chop til You Drop gets released for the Wii on February 24. This Dead Rising sequel follows Frank West, your favourite journalist who has a habit of bashing zombie heads in with golf clubs

The features of the new Dead Rising sequel include:

-Uses the same engine as Resident Evil 4 Wii edition

-New uses for the Wiimote when you aim, fire, swing weapons, reload and more

-New enemies exclusive to Dead Rising: Chop Till You Drop

-Improved save functionality allows for more seamless gameplay 

Enjoy the screenshots below of some hardcore zombie pummelling and mark your calendars for the 24^th of February!

Flock is going to be one hell of a puzzle game with just enough cuteness to make me interested. Here are some screenshots from the upcoming game and trust me, they don't look baaaaad.

Mad Catz is going to be cashing in on Street Fighter IV, but that may be for your benefit. Like gaming-inspired gear? Ka-ching!

An official Street Fighter IV controller and arcade stick for the Xbox 360 and PS3 are the periphs being customized and to be honest, they don't look half bad. If you're a little too hardcore for just a painted-up controller, you can buy the 'Tournament Edition' of the arcade stick, which will have arcade quality features.

If you're interested in even more Street Fighter IV crap you can get a wall scroll, console stickers and faceplates. Woo! Unnecessary accessories!

SEGA confirmed today that Aliens: Colonial Marines isn't abandoned and will in fact be released in the first quarter of 2009. Although last year, it was uncertain whether or not SEGA would go through with the game because they had to cut funds after Brothers in Arms: Hell's Highway didn't have the greatest sales.

The release will be sometime between April and June; I will prepare myself to have vagina-like-face-huggers flying at me then. I need to buy a hockey mask.

Who ya guna call?

Well, starting June 19, it'll be the Ghostbusters. That is the release date for the Blu-ray Disc release of Ghostbusters the movie AND Ghostbusters: The Video Game.

There aren't many specifics regarding the game's release floating around on the internet, but we can assume that that platforms that will be explored by the game first will be the 360, PS3 and PC. But that's just a guess.

Keep an eye out for more info, Ghosbusters fans!

Relic released their list of requirements for their highly-anticipated RTS game, Dawn of War II. Hopefully your computer isn't a 5-year-old piece of shit that can't play it. Listed below are the minimum and recommended requirements.

Minimum Requirements

* Windows XP SP2 or Windows Vista SP1

* P4 3.2 GHz (single core) or any Dual Core processor

* 1 GB RAM (XP), 1.5 GB RAM (Vista)

* A 128MB Video Card (Shader Model 3) - Nvidia GeForce 6600 GT / ATI X1600, or equivalent

* 5.5 GB of Hard Drive space

Recommended

* Windows XP SP2 or Windows Vista SP1

* AMD Athlon 64?2 4400+ or any Intel Core 2 Duo

* 2 GB RAM (XP and Vista)

* A 256MB Video Card (Shader Model 3) - Nvidia GeForce 7800 GT / ATI X1900, or equivalent

* 5.5 GB of Hard Drive space  

You're in luck if you received a brand new copy of Gears of War 2 for Christmas (or bought it) - you have then received a bonus download code for the Flashback Map Pack. Free stuff! This map pack includes 5 updated Gears of War maps that you can use in every GoW2 multiplayer mode.

If you bought the game second-hand and you don't have the original download code, you can purchase the Flashback Map Pack for 400 Microsoft Points. That ends up being about $1 per map, so it's a pretty good deal.

Today, Nintendo revealed that the New Play Control version of Mario Power Tennis is going to be receiving a new control update to play the experience better. The controls consist of swinging your Wiimote in a variety of ways that mimic real tennis techniques.

"Serve
Swing the Wiimote from down to up to toss the ball up, then swing to serve.

Top Spin
Swing from lower right to upper left for forehand. Reverse for a backhand.

Slice Spin
Swing from upper right to lower left for forehand. Reverse for backhand.

Flat Shot
Swing from right to left for a forehand. Reverse for a backhand.

Lob
Swing the Wiimote from down to up.

Drop
Swing the Wiimote from up to down.

Smash
When presented with a smash opportunity, a star will appear on the court. Move your character over the star, then swing up to down to perform a smash. "

Along with these moves, each Mario character has their own "special" move.

This looks like it's going to be a big improvement over the Wii Sports version of tennis. You'll be able to move your character around with the left thumbstick on the Nunchuk. Speaking from a Wii Sports tennis addict, this is going to help a lot. I can't count the times I screamed at my tv when my character wouldn't respond and go where I wanted her to. (You can choose to keep the auto movement selection on, however.)

EA Sports announced today their new DS game, Football Academy. This is football to the rest of the world and not the US (aka. soccer). This football/soccer game will include a collection of mini-games and different challenges that will not only entertain you, but teach you more about soccer. (Are you listening, Americans?) Football Academy will launch for the Nintendo DS in March 2009.

If you own a vagina and two X chromosomes, you should be pretty familiar with the hit ABC show, Grey's Anatomy. Well now apparently Ubisoft announced that the company signed a licensing agreement with ABC so that it can develop a video game based on this television drama. Um. What?

The game would be developed for the Wii, DS and PC (aka. girl platforms) and would be released sometime in 2009.

"Ubisoft is thrilled to be collaborating with ABC Studios to turn this phenomenal television series into an interactive experience," said the vice president of worldwide licensing at Ubisoft. "In Grey's Anatomy: The Video Game, fans will have a chance to take on the roles of all of their favorite doctors in an all-new original storyline. As each doctor, players will make important personal and professional decisions, explore the direct relationships with each other, and perform the delicate surgeries the series is known for, all through fun and engaging game play."

The Wii Fit isn't just for your desperate, chunky, 20-somethings that are too lazy to go out and jog. Amputees in the United Kingdom are using the Wii Fit and balance board to aid them in their treatment.  I'm not sure why the balance board technology was applied to gaming before it was applied to helping people heal and gain their liberty and whatnot. We live in a pretty screwed up world, but hey, at least things worked out all right in the end.

Since there wasn't a lot of great content to watch instantly on my Xbox 360 from Netflix, I had to settle for reruns of The Office and the 2 seasons of Jericho (which was fantastic for me, since I have been playing Fallout 3 non-stop). It was nice, but I couldn't help but feel a little disappointed. But not anymore! All of the streaming content from Columbia Pictures is available to Xbox 360 owners... congratulations!

I'm not sure how or why this happened, so you might want to thank your lucky stars and watch the movies on your 360 that you have really, really been wanting to. Otherwise, the rug may be pulled out from under you and Columbia will take back its movies. You never know.

Tomorrow, January 7th, Crayon Physics Deluxe is going to available for purchase for only $19.95. For all of the physics and crayon fun you can think of, this is a pretty good post-Christmas treat. The game is truly extraordinary; just by drawing a dot or a circle; the game knows what to do. I was never a fan of physics in high school, seeing that my teacher was a perver with an IQ of 24, but I think this is fun. Most of you are probably pretty familiar with this puzzle game, but if not, check out the video to see what you're in store for.

So some tiny group named PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals chose Molyneux's game, Fable II, as this year's Most Animal-Friendly Video Game. Well good job, Fable II. You did not interest me enough to play BUT you did include a dog as one of the main characters, gosh dang it!

Left 4 Dead has received an update on Xbox 360. As to what it does exactly, I'm not so sure, but I'm betting my booty that they didn't add Legacy controls. Why exactly are they still discriminating against the freaks who are addicted to the N64 way of life? It could be that they want to fix some buggies that really none of us notice...

But I just wanted to express my dissatisfaction at Valve for not adding Legacy yet.

Who doesn't like ninjas? In the first quarter of 2009, Ninja Blade is going to be released. Ninja Blade will put you into the soft shoes of a ninja who was given a task to defend Tokyo from a genetically mutating disease that will probably destroy the human race. Step into the dark and mysterious world of "Ninja Blade," where gamers will be given the epic task to defend Tokyo and ultimately humanity itself from a horrific, genetically mutating disease.

Some of the ninja-riffic features include:

Unique Ninja abilities.

In order to properly kick the asses of a genetically mutated horde, you can use special abilities such as "Ninja Vision" and "Todome."

Variety of weapons, tools and "Ninjutsu"

With the amount of varied environments you'll be experiencing in this game, you'll be forced to think on your ninja-feet about your strategic options. (In this game, "Ninjutsu" is a special power that can stun enemies or be used to protect yourself.)

Interactive quick-time events.

We all know what these are. I'm not too hyped about having to PRESS A at a given time... but they are easy enough.

Modern Realism.

A classic ninja story is told from a realistic-looking 3D Tokyo, giving the game major cool points. Too bad I have no idea what Tokyo looks like.

The sequel to 2007's Battlestations, Battlestations: Pacific was created by Eidos Interactive and should be released sometime in the spring of 2009. If you're not into the historical aspect of an(other) WWII game, then you can at least enjoy the fantastic airplanes and battleships included in the game.

The second Battlestations game is going to drop gamers deep into the Pacific conflict of World War II in two extremely different campaigns. You will command the US fleet through The Battle of Midway to Okinawa. Alternatively, you can play as the Japanese. If you're so inclined, you can also play multiplayer; there is a lineup of five new co-op and team-based modes.

Game developers must have been listening to my innermost thoughts recently. Aside from realizing how wildly attractive I find older men, they would also discover that I have been needing a portable version of my favorite word-puzzle game- Scrabble! Ever since the Scrabulous Facebook app went through its own drama, I have been without a portable word challenge. But no longer! 

Scrabble for the PSP and DS looks pretty darn good. Board games look pretty sexy when translated into handheld board games. I do not own a PSP or DS but if I did, I would march my rump to the nearest retailer to pick up a copy. That way, I can triumphantly spell "quixotic" while I sit by myself in Panera. Hazzah!

Apparently Zima is the root of all evil.

So a group of Illinois legislators, who I assume are old, white women, recently passed a bill banning the advertisement, promotion or marketing of "Alcopop" beverages in video games, theater performances and concerts that might be geared towards children.

Just as a reminder, this is the group of legislators who attempted to pass a violent game ban in 2005 until it was found unconstitutional by a federal judge. Now personally, I think this is unconstitutional. There has to be some way in which that is interfering with interstate trade.

Over in Europe, people are on top of things (small cars, scooters, scones and lists of games for Q1 of this year). Capcom Europe revealed their release schedule for games in the first quarter of 2009 and it's looking pretty tasty so far. Although this isn't the US's list, I'm hoping an official one to be out soon. Don't worry, they should be pretty similar.

February TBA - Flock (XBLA/PSN)

February 20 - Street Fighter IV (X360/PS3)

February 27- Dead Rising: Chop Till You Drop (Wii)

February 27- Neopets Puzzle Adventure (Wii/DS/PC)

March 13 - Resident Evil 5 (X360/PS3)

March TBA - MotoGP (Wii)

March TBA - Bionic Commando (X360/PS3)

I took the liberty of putting in bold the ones you should care about.

Blessed are those who own a Wii... KIRBY!

Kirby's Dream Land 3 ( originally for the SNES) is a 1-2 player game that will only run you 800 Wii Points and will bring back so much nostalgia you might have a stroke because of it. Although this virtual console title is being released around the same time as Kirby Superstar, I'm not going to let that stop me from downloading it. My Wii needs a little Kirby-loving in between 10-hour Animal Crossing sessions.

Speaking of which, anyone have peaches?

Roy Orbison is being added to the list of artists in the Rock Band store by Harmonix and MTV Games. Now the name Orbison sounds familiar to me but I have no idea if he was a rock legend or some creepy uncle that touched me... but I have a feeling it isn't the latter.

Apparently, Orbison won some Grammy Awards for being a singer, songwriter and performer. People loved him so much that he had nine Top 10 hits in four years in the early 1960s. That's pretty impressive. So instead of succeeding yourself, do you want to download this famous musician's tracks and play along? Yeah, me too!

The "Roy Orbison Pack 01" will include "Oh, Pretty Woman," "Ooby Dooby," "In Dreams," Claudette," "Mean Woman Blues" and "You Got It."

So the spec requirements for The Sims 3 was just released... and instead of feeling pretty pumped about this new game coming out, I'm about to flip my lid. I think that my computer, which is only 3 years old mind you, CAN'T HANDLE IT. Where I am lacking is the video card and maybe video RAM.

But lucky you if your computer is beefy enough to play The Sims 3, it's going to be a doozy of a game.

Minimum Spec Details for The Sims 3

Desktop:

XP w/ service pack 2            

Pentium IV 2.0 GHz / Athlon XP 2000+ (CPU)

1 GB (RAM)

GeForce FX 5900 / Radeon 9500 (Graphics)

128 MB (Video RAM)

Vista w/ service pack 1         

Pentium IV 2.4 GHz / Athlon XP 2400+ (CPU)

1.5 GB (RAM)

GeForce FX 5900 / Radeon 9500 (Graphics)

128 MB (Video RAM)

Laptop:

XP w/ service pack 2            

Pentium IV 2.0 GHz / Athlon XP 2000+ (CPU)

1.5 GB (RAM)

GeForce Go 6200 / Radeon mobile 9600 (Graphics)

128 MB (Video RAM)

Vista w/ service pack 1

Pentium IV 2.4 GHz / Athlon XP 2400+  (CPU)

2.0 GB (RAM)

GeForce Go 6200 / Radeon mobile 9600 (Graphics)

128 MB (Video RAM)

Since it is after the new year and new games might be in short supply for the first part of Q1 of 2009, take some time to sit down with your dog and watch a movie via Xbox Live. In the U.S. Xbox Live Video Marketplac you'll find Pixar's Wall-E, the movie that made me laugh, cry and have the best feeling I have ever had in a movie theater. An experience with Wall-E only costs 320 Microsoft points (for HiDef, 480 points). If you're a bit too hardcore for Wall-E, you might be interested in renting The Dark Knight via the Xbox Live Marketplace. So orgasmic and cute or orgasmic and action-packed, you'll win either way.

Do you want a nice, big, thick Lips...library? Well you're in luck. Microsoft released three new Lips songs. These tunes cost between 160 and 180 MS points apiece. You can pick from a small list of songs that include music from The Supremes, Men at Work and Earth, Wind and Fire

"Where Did Our Love Go" by The Supremes

"Be Good Johnny" by Men At Work

"Let's Groove" by Earth, Wind and Fire

If you're into the gory goodness that only Dead Space can provide, check out the Dead Space comic made by Image Comics and Newsarama. This is the first story in the six-part series; all of the events take place before the events of the video game, where the protagonist is stuck on the USG Ishimura.  takes place prior to the events of the video game on the USG Ishimura. If you haven't played the game yet and do NOT want to see any spoilers, I don't suggest reading the online comic just yet. If you're interested enough, the comics is available in a collectable hardcover edition.

Get ready nerds! The multiplayer demo for Lord of the Rings: Conquest is available for download on Xbox Live Marketplace or the PlayStation Network. The husky demo weighing in at 1.25GB demo is offered worldwide. In-game, you can play in the armies of "good" or "evil." In most cases I always choose to be evil, because the bad guys always look so much cooler than the good guys. And the bad boy thing really gets me. ... .. What were we talking about again?

The developer of LotR: Conquest, Pandemic, says the game should arrive on January 13 for X360, PS3 and PC.

A new Korean action MMORPG game called Tears Saga is on the horizon... and aside from sounding completely emo it has some interesting features that are going to be included in the game. It's currently being developed, but there should be a closed beta sometime next year.

The said interesting feature is that the game will show detailed "exciting actions" online. This is pretty uncommon because these actions are tricky to act out online because of lag issues between different users; it's hard to keep everything in sync. But Tears Saga is hoping to be the shining light in the world of MMORPGS; it will aim to have the most "exciting actions" online.

The AMC (Avatar Mouse Control) system created a way so that gamers can make body parts of their avatars move with a click of the mouse. Most games can only use pre-fabricated actions; by clicking a certain icon or pressing a button the in-game character will respond. In Tears Saga, however, you will be able to jiggle your cursor around and theoretically your character will listen.

This, if not too convoluted, will allow players to implement more strategy than usual in this MMORPG. By moving your character a certain way you would be able to improve the use of weapons and evasive actions. These dynamic actions are similar to playing a fighting game like Tekken or Mortal Kombat online.

So keep your eyes peeled for this truly interactive MMORPG in the first half of 2009; if it is successful, you might be able to chop off Orc heads in an "exciting action" way.

In order to draw even more attention to the so-cheesy-it's-awesome My Bloody Valentine 3D, Xbox.com is hosting a Left 4 Dead Bloody Valentine Play & Win weekend. In order to promote the film being released on January 16th, prizes are being given away over the weekend through a haze of killing the living dead. This festival of zombie killing starts January 9th and ends on the 11th. If you register to win and play Left 4 Dead online, you have a chance to win one of the seventy-four 4000 Microsoft point prize packs or a Valve autographed Left 4 Dead poster.

It seems that Christmas will never end... but this is a good thing.

If you pop over to http://store.steampowered.com/ and check their list of games, you'll see that Portal is selling for a Steam download price of $4.99! For a game that has won critical praise from everyone, that is an insanely good deal. It won't last forever, though. Be aware that the deal ends JANUARY 2ND. Which, as we all know, is tomorrow.

There should be other worthwhile games on sale as well- check them out!

EDGE employees have had some intimate moments recently with Uncharted 2. The story in the magazine will give some back-story and depth to the character of Nathan Drake; although you love him, you might realize he is as multifaceted as most of us (aka can be a douche bag).

Nathan is not on a quest for Francis Drake in the new game; now he is focused on Marco Polo. Polo's return journey to Europe from the court of Kublai Khan resulted in a 600+ man army dwindle to approximately a dozen. Apparently that sounded interesting. Drake's journey will lead him to a variety of different environments, including snowy Tibet in a search for an ancient gem.

There might be some stealth options given in this new Uncharted, but don't worry, it isn't going to be a Splinter Cell copy. Instead of shooting you just have the option of doing something a little less common. Instead of worrying about that, you should be excited. It's just a different way that Uncharted 2 is going to please you.

And have I mentioned that I would get naked for Nathan Drake and cover myself in chocolate?

No matter where you pre-order Killzone 2 for PS3, you're going to be getting some goodies.

If you happen to be a Gamestop fan and want to pre-order your copy there, you will get access and an exclusive demo that begins on the third of February. Not happy enough with that type of freebie? Well if you reserve your copy of Killzone 2 from the blue-polo'd people at Best Buy, you will get an exclusive PS3 theme (although the Best Buy pre-order page makes no mention of a complimentary theme).

Or you could pre-order a copy at each place and get a bunch of swaggy stuff . Sound good?

I love World of Warcraft for one reason and one reason alone- the people who play World of Warcraft are so whiny and out of touch with reality that it makes everyday hilarious (assuming this whole fiasco was over the Blizzard game World of Warcraft).

According to GamePolitics, a 17-year-old Ohio WoW-gamer was arrested Monday. Why was he arrested, you ask? Well, he allegedly threatened to commit suicide to a Blizzard rep after not getting what he wanted. As a juvenile idiot, he didn't think of the repercussions of threatening to commit SUICIDE to a company representative. The rep then called 911 and the little snot-nosed kid was charged with a first-degree misdemeanor. According to the police report, the kid tried to get out of trouble by saying his threat of suicide was just a joke in order to get what he wanted in the game. The policeman hopefully said "get a life." The court date is January 6.

So learn your lesson kiddies. If you're playing WoW and get into a fight with a Blizzard rep you have two choices: either get arrested for threatening to commit suicide or just go ahead and off yourself. It's the only way.

Resident Evil 5 is going to be a beautiful, scary, awesome game no matter where you play it... but if you want to satisfy your thirst for knowledge, drink this up: out of the two console demos, the Xbox 360 version looks much better in the graphics department. You don't trust my judgment? Check the screens, baby!

The-Horror.com assembled a gallery of screenshots from both demos and the Xbox 360 version appears to be a few builds ahead of the PS3. You can tell by the shadows on all of the different surfaces and sharpness of the graphics. These differences might be smoothed out by RE-Day hits, but for now, the 360 wins.

So a long, long time ago, 2K Sports' Don King Presents Prizefighter was announced. If you can't tell from the title, this Wii game was boxing related. If you don't remember this happening at all, I don't blame you. The licensed boxing game was announced last December for release in the spring, which kind of never happened.

Now the boxing game is named Don King Boxing, there is balance board functionality (making some of the screenshots look surprisingly like Wii Fit), and it isn't cancelled! I'm surprised that it is still in the works, seeing that we haven't heard a peep from Don King Boxing lately.

This boxing game is scheduled for release on March 31, 2009... but seeing that it was announced in December originally to be released the next spring, I'm not so sure they are going to follow through with this.

So if you're into boxing but not quite addicted to Punch-Out yet, then you might want to consider this. Or don't. I don't care. I'm not your mother.

Are you having a less-than-stellar New Year's Eve get together tonight? Need a way to spice it up that isn't a keg stand or my famous nacho dip?

The score written by the genius Colin O'Malley for Tomb Raider: Underworld is available to be downloaded for free. UMM, PARTY TUNES! You have a few options to choose from: you can get bundles of tracks that are associated with each of the game's regions or you can download one honking-huge "deluxe edition" containing all 71 tracks in 320kbps MP3 format.

If someone brings the Lara Croft tunes, I'll bring myself looking as skanky as possible.

Time to ring in the New year with some funky new clothes for your avatar in the NXE. Apparently someone over at Microsoft is big into raving, because I'm not sure where else you'd see these clothes.

Acid green jeans, day-glo zebra pumps and dark purple jeans? Wow! My avatar is going to have more fun than me this year.

Men:
Pixel Art Hoodie
Rave Baseball Cap
Dark Purple Jeans
Green Skinny Fit Jeans
Pink Sweat Bands

Women:
Green Chunky Ring
Red Chunky Ring
Yellow Fingerless Gloves
Blue Fingerless Gloves
Chunky Beaded Bracelet
Day-glo Zebra Print Pumps
Rave Baseball Cap

Gamers are pretty used to WWII games (Call of Duty, Medal of Honor, etc)... but how many games have they played that let them experience the detailed interiors of the planes they kick ass in?

A producer of addons for Microsoft's Flight Simulator X from the United Kingdom just launched their first WWII aircraft simulator, Real Flight. The first simulator product is going to be a replica of the Grumman F6F Hellcat; the Hellcat is a famous carrier based fighter that joined WWII in February 1943.

The point of these simulators is to keep the experience as real as possible; Real Flight's attention to detail gained a lot of positive feedback from simulator fans. The inside of the planes look realistic, and they are built for FSX (SP1, SP2 and Acceleration).

So if you don't think that you have the balls to get into any kind of aircraft, these realistic simulators might be for you. The cockpit looks identical to a real plane, down to every detail. You might want to give it a try, historians or yellowbellies.

Check it out at www.realflight.co.uk

Is there a Blockbuster nearby? Can you dig out some ones from underneath your sofa and ride your bike to it? If so, get ready. Over at NeoGAF, there have been reports of local Blockbusters may be a spring of cheaply priced games; buy one get one free games, to be exact. Jusqu'à (up to) January 5th, Blockbuster will be offering the buy 1 get 1 free promo on games.

If the game is for $14.99 or lower, it qualifies for this sale. ANY game. Do you know how many older or used games there are for less than 15 bucks? I highly suggest going to Blockbuster immediately. Thanks.

Wired, that lovable magazine, has named Duke Nukem Forever as the top piece of vaporware in 2008. For anyone who doesn't understand what vaporware even is, here is an explanation: "Vaporware is a term used to describe a software or hardware product that is announced by a developer well in advance of release, but which then fails to emerge after having well exceeded the period of development time that was initially claimed or would normally be expected for the development cycle of a similar product."

I can see where they are coming from though... this remake has been in the works since when, 1997? I'm well convinced that older fans of the Duke are well and dead by now. But maybe the optimism for Duke Nukem Forever isn't completely unwarranted! There are even more teaser images and there is a fully working demo floating out there somewhere. The founders of Duke Nukem need to quit WoW-ing and get to work. You hear me, George Broussard and Scott Miller of 3-D Realms?

I want to bring you up to speed on Dead Space; it is horrifying, gross, dark, and set in deep space. But after all of that madenss and mayhem, there is even a deeper mystery that you can crack into. Over at CVG you can find the tools necessary to decipher the secret language of the in-game religion, Unitology. Yeah it kind of surprised me, too. I didn't think there was more to this game aside from more gore.

If you're into back stories, this is certainly your lucky day. Along with the knowledge to be had, you can also pick up some power nodes and other little Dead Space treats. If you haven't played through the game and you are sensitive to spoilers, you might not be interested in digging into this just yet.

And speaking of spoilers by the way, Dumbledore is dead. Snape did it.

Are you ready for a new game on New Years Day?

Dreamspike Studios just recently announced their upcoming RTS game Space War Commander. I think the appeal for me would be that the game is set in a universe that no longer needs humans. That's kind of creepy, us being an inferior, forgotten race.

So it's you against the universe, which is how I feel I am anyway sometimes. In this RTS you need to defend yourself against pirates, trade cargo, trick your enemies, et cetera. Pretty much, you are a space trader pirate and you want to be the best. Easy enough, right?

To sum it up! Here is what you can do:

Defeat pirates, mercenaries, and regulars with your hand-picked force of Assassin ships, Scavengers and more.

Conquest Mode: 30 challenging galaxies, 7 different races, an original, thought-provoking story and a fresh musical score.

Gauntlet Mode: Money carries over between maps, 8 types of gauntlets, and an infinite variety of galaxies.

You can play Space War Commander for years but finish an average game in less than 15 minutes!

Run blockades, command surprise attacks, disrupt enemy plans, play one faction against another, and crush your foes with an uncountable number of your own creative strategies.

One of the writers for Left 4 Dead has alluded to Valve announcing official downloadable content here shortly. The writer, Chet Faliszek, was able to confirm that Valve has been working on some new scenarios. "What we want to do is just deliver more content you can play at this point."

Along with releasing DLC, Valve plans to expand the Versus mode further. As of right now, you can only play in this mode for the Blood Harvest and No Mercy campaigns. Opening up both Dead Air and Death Toll campaigns to Versus mode would be a big boon for gamers. I want to sneak up on my friends as a Hunter and then rip the living daylights out of their eyes in every campaign, thank you. Once the updates and downloads become live, Valve plans on releasing them for the Xbox 360 and PC platforms at the same time.

Trust me, I have gotten multiple rounds of zombie killing out of Left 4 Dead without the downloadable content. Once I ramped up the difficulty, it left me a slobbering, screaming mess that terrorized my friends online "KILL THE TANK! KILL THE TANK! IF YOU DISTURB THE WITCH I WILL RIP OUT YOUR INTESTINE AND FEED IT TO ANGRY DOGS!"

I don't have friends anymore, but at least I can still play Left 4 Dead.  

If you have been wondering "where is a truckload of screenshots from the new Halo 3 ODST game that is going to be released sometime next year?" then your mind will be put to rest my friend! Along with the Limited Edition picture you saw earlier, we are letting you feast your eyes upon some artwork from the new Halo 3 game. It sure is purdy, isn't it? Although, I must admit that I am a little sad to see some Halo stuff out in the web that is missing Master Chief.

The original F.E.A.R was bloody, horrifying and won critical praise everywhere. But then the expansions happened. TimeGate's expansions, Extraction Point and Perseus Mandate, took away from the original focus of F.E.A.R.

Monolith's Dave Matthews' (their lead art designer and not to be confused with Dave Matthews' Band) main problem with the expansions is that TimeGate took the story in a direction that Monolith wouldn't have followed. TimeGate didn't follow F.E.A.R's unsettling antagonist, Alma, as much as Monolith would have liked. This caused a great drop off in F.E.A.R fans.

Now that Monolith is back behind the steering wheel of F.E.A.R 2: Project Origin, you can expect a return to greatness comparable with the original game. The story will continue in a way that Monolith with be happy with and I'm sure will scare the bejeezies out of me.

It's a win/win situation.

The global distribution of Fallout 3 will lead to a world-wide nuclear war. Let me explain.

Once everyone sees how fantastically cool a post-apocalyptic world is they would not hesitate to blow the crap out of their neighbors. I mean, worst case scenario they turn into a Super Mutant like those in Capital Wasteland and to be honest- how bad is that? If this ever came to pass, I'd have bubblegum-pink hair like my character Allison in Fallout 3. She is wicked sexy.

The distribution of Fallout 3 will be in 19 new countries on PS3, Xbox 360 and PC:

Greece
Malta
Cyprus
Turkey
United Arab Emirates
Kuwait
Oman
Saudi Arabia
Yemen
Lebanon
Qatar
Egypt
Bulgaria
Slovenia
Croatia
Bosnia & Herzegovina
Serbia
Macedonia
Montenegro

Have you saved up enough money to buy the Halo Wars Limited Edition pack? I hope so, because it looks like you get some goodies with it. Enjoy the picture of the Halo Wars goodness Limited Edition. The Limited Collector's Edition of Halo Wars can be bought for $79.99. What seems to be included is the in-game "Honor Guard" Covenant Wraith, a graphic novel, six Leader cards, and a "Spirit of Fire" patch. Also, those who buy the Limited Collector's Edition will get early access to the Halo 3 Mythic Map Pack.

If you get this, you're going to pick up so many chicks. And when I say pick up chicks, I mean put on 10lbs from playing Halo and eating pizza for a week straight.

Chalk up your Wiimote! There is a pretty cool WiiWare game being produced by Hudson Entertainment: Pool Revolution: Cue Sports. Now worthwhile WiiWare games might seem hard to come by, but Pool Revolution: Cue Sports is worth the money.

The best part about this pool game is that if you're a pool shark, you can rip apart other people online. "Pool Revolution: Cue Sports is the only pool game for WiiWare that lets people play online," said the Vice President of Product Development at Hudson Entertainment. "Pool fans can now play with people from all over the world in the comfort of their living rooms." Let's hope the WiFi Connection for Pool Revolution isn't as horrible as the one for Animal Crossing: City Folk or the Wii Speak Channel. Nintendo has been having a lot of problems with their WFC and servers. So good luck connecting!

As one would think, Pool Revolution: Cue Sports features lets you use the Wii Remote like an actual cue. But if you prefer to be a wimp, you can use the buttons on the remote to use the in-game cue instead of actual movements. Up to four players can play a variety of pool games, including eight ball, nine ball, rotation, and snooker. You can also try to perform trick shots in Puzzle Mode. If you're cool enough.

Gears of War 2... Rick Roll'd?... oh God.

So I received Gears of War 2 for Christmas this year since I'm but a lowly beggar who can't afford to buy it, but now I'm considering never touching the thing. Pixel Flix Studios brought Rick Astley to the Gears scene in this weird mixture of Baird and some Astley.

Once you get over the fact that you've been Rick Roll'd about 50 times in your life, you can really enjoy the hilarity of watching Marcus, Dom and some Locust get it up the ass.

Woah, Activision, woah. I'm just now getting over my holiday-related hangover and you already have tons of press releases going out? Ah, my head hurts. So apparently the latest DLC for Guitar Hero: World Tour is up for the downloading. The 3 new tracks will cost you 200 Wii Points... but there is a bonus of 3 additional tracks that are free of charge. Thank the Wii gods.

The Hard Rock Track Pack:

Hinder - "Use Me" - 200 Wii Points
Nickelback - "Because of You" - 200 Wii Points
Rev Theory - "Light it Up" - 200 Wii Points

The Reggae Rock Track Pack:

Pepper - "Your Face" - free
Slightly Stupid - "Jimi" - free
The Expendables - "Sacrifice" - free

Christmas comes but once a year... Game Mechanic Studios acknowledged that and took time on the special day to announce its first project, Art of War. The large image that the company had on their website was a screenshot of one of their levels, 'Obsidian Serpent.'

The studio co-founder Jason Alejandre commented on the upcoming project, "We make shooters and we are going to start with what we do best which is exactly that." The world of Art of War is supposedly ¼ realities, while the rest is founded in imagination. But by judging from the screenshots, this game might be worth your time. Who doesn't like jungles and ancient ruins?

Who is the Velvet Assassin? I'm not too sure, but at this point it doesn't matter... she is hot and she has various sexy outfits. Why wouldn't I want to have lesbian fantasies about this chick?

As a character, Violette is a normal woman... but she is strong, sexy and skilled. The best part about her is that she is realistic as well; she isn't the hulk in lingerie. Violette has lost everything because of the war (WWII) and wants her payback by destroying the Nazi regime. She is behind enemy lines and must use everything available to her to survive and conquer...

And this includes sexy outfits.

I love it when the Rock Band store adds songs that I'm not embarrassed to admit that I listen, and will rock out, to. Just before Christmas, songs from Snow Patrol, Deep Purple, James Gang and Jethro Tull were made available. If only Rock Band had a one legged flute peripheral.

As the Scottish version of Coldplay, Snow Patrol may not be the manliest of bands... but they do make some pretty sweet tunes. The debut song in the DLC was also their first single from their new album, "Take Back the City." (The new album is A Hundred Million Suns from 2008.)

If you're in the mood for some Deep Purple, you can download "Space Truckin''" from their album Machine Head (1972). It may not be "Smoke on the Water" but there you can still rock out to it.

Another oldie, "Funk #49," is being added to your Rock Band DLC list from the album James Gang Rides Again (1970). It's a little confusing for a young person such as myself, but the album features Joe Walsh, Dale Peters and Jimmy Fox together. I'm not sure how that works, since I thought Joe Walsh just sang about rocky mountain ways or whatever.

And finally... the last part of the new DLC is...Jethro Tull. The single "Hymn 43" is going to be the next Jethro Tull song to be added from their famous album, Aqualung (1971). It's not too bad, considering they already put "Aqualung" up on the Rock Band 2 list. Once "Cross-Eyed Mary" and "Up To Me" make the cut, I'll be happy.

This new Rock Band DLC will be available starting December 30, 2008. You can find them on the Xbox Live Marketplace or the PlayStation Network, depending on which flavor of Rock Band you play. NOTE: Thursday, January 8, 2008 is the date that the DLC will be available on the PSN.

No longer will you have to struggle and strain to get a Nintendo Wii for your little hellians! Gamasutra and the Video Game Price Charts confirm that the resale market for the Nintendo Wii has been so saturated that it is nearly impossible to sell it above retail price anymore.

Last year, it was pretty common to find Wiis on sites like ebay.com for $500+. Now, the site now lists hundreds of Wiis; many of those consoles are not even being sold because they were listed so far above retail value. Thank God Nintendo has been dishing out enough Wiis so that you don't have to sell your first born child in order to buy a Wii for your first born. It just complicated things.

Oh how the mighty have fallen! At one point in time you couldn't buy Halo: Combat Evolved for less than $20... now you can get it for a mere $7.50.

The final Xbox Live Marketplace holiday deal marks down the original Halo: Combat Evolved to 600 MSP ($7.50). This deal is live now for Xbox Live Gold members. The price isn't too bad, considering you usually have to pay 1200 MSP ($15). 50% off!

So give yourself a little holiday treat (and lay off the egg nog) and play some good old Halo! Why, if I had some real-life friends... I would have a LAN party!

The Sci-Fi MMORPG Tabula Rasa is circling the drain... but in order to clean its slate and make amends for sucking in the gaming world, it will be made free-to-play until February 28, 2009. On that date, the servers will implode and the game will be no more.

Before, NCSoft had announced the game would be free-to-play beginning Jan. 10, but perhaps because of the Christmas spirit epidemic, they are not sticking to that date. New players can go to the Tabula Rasa support site and request a serial code to download the game via FTP.

If you played the game before but have since abandoned it, you can go to PlayNC.com and reactivate your account. Although credit card numbers will have to be entered into the system, it won't actually charge you for playing.

This Christmas present is a little bittersweet; yes, you will be able to play a new game for 2 months but I hope to God you don't like it, because after that you're screwed. 

If you're not feeling too rich this holiday season but still need to pick up some last minute gifts, head over to GOG.com (http://www.gog.com). Five new holiday bundles are available for a ridiculously low price for a limited amount of time. Until December 31, you can purchase any of the following bundles for ONLY  $9.98: Fallout & Fallout 2; MDK & MDK 2; Freespace with Silent Threat mission pack & Freespace 2; Descent 1+2 & Descent 3 with Mercenary expansion; Stonekeep & Lionheart.

And GOG.com cares about you' anyone who's already bought one of the games will get $1 off the second title. I mean you're saving pennies off of pennies there, but it's still a nice thought.

Adam Oldakowski, a big wig of GOG.com, said, "We want to bring people the best value no matter where they live. With our Polish origins, we know how awful it feels when popular web services and products are not available or are more expensive just because of where we live. That's why we're committed to making sure that these great holiday bundles are available worldwide, and that our prices and product catalogues are the same for everyone across the globe; we think that everyone should have access to great games like Oddworld: Abe's Exoddus and Patrician 3."

Sony announced today the North American release of MLB 09 The Show available for PS3, PSP and PS2. If you're looking for baseball realism, look no further than the MLB franchise. According to Scott A. Steinberg, Vice President, Product Marketing, SCEA (Sony Computer Entertainment America), "With enhanced gameplay features and more attention to detail than ever before, MLB 09 The Show is prepared to deliver an unsurpassed next-gen baseball experience."

In order to make a virtual baseball game more appealing, MLB 09 The Show added several new features. The features you'll be experiencing are incredible stadium detail and signage, wear and tear on the field, dusk to night lighting transitions, and stadium JumboTron animations. Too bad the game won't include rude, fat fans sitting too close to you.

This new MLB 09 The Show should be a pretty good baseball game once it gets developed and released. I'm not really into baseball games myself because they leave out the most important bits; like really hot sunshine that burns you in places you didn't know existed.

I know why the economy is in a recession- the single reason why. Too many people are too consumed with World of Warcraft. Instead of learning a trade or having a professional job and making money, people are paying $15/mo to play WoW.

Maybe I'm not an economist, but the numbers make me think that this is the reason. Blizzard Entertainment, Inc. announced that World of Warcraft has more than 11.5 million subscribers worldwide. This ridiculous number was reached after the new expansion, the Wrath of the Lich King, was released.

In the first day of the release, the Wrath of the Lich King sold more than 2.8 million copies, thus making it the fastest-selling PC game of all time. See? This is why my hours at Blimpies got cut. WHY?!

Maybe that was an exaggeration. 

Many doctors in the United Kingdom are warning people against Wii-related injuries this holiday season. Apparently, medical professionals are seeing an increase in injuries due to inappropriate playtime with the Wii. The reported injuries include, but are not limited to, back strains, knee strains and broken fingers.

Leeds Training Hospital and the British Society for Surgery of the Hand are officially warning children's and adults alike to be careful while playing the Wii. Apparently the majority of people in the UK who purchase a Wii have an average IQ of 63.

Seeing that it is the holidays, I thought I would post something that is relevant to what is on all of our minds: alcohol. I can't get through family parties and chit chat without being at least a little bit wasted, and the best way to do so is through some cool, gameresque cocktails ("cl" stands for centiliter. Two cl approximately equals one "shot")!

My favorite drink would have to be the Portal-themed teleportation shots. Be safe kiddies. :)

Chell

Glass: Highball Glass
Garnish: 3 Lime Wedge in drink
Shaken
5 cl Cranberry Juice
3 cl Grape Juice
2 cl Apple Juice
1 cl Lime Juice
2 cl gin

Directions:
Shake all ingredients with ice and strain into ice-filled Highball glass.

GLaDOS
Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System

Glass: Chilled Martini Glass
Garnish: One Square Icecube in drink
Shaken
1 cl Absinthe or Pernod
1 cl Bols Mint
2 cl Sourz Apple
1 cl Lime Juice
2 cl Apple Juice
1 cl Chilled Water

Directions: Shake all ingredients with ice and fine strain into Cocktail glass.

Sentry Gun
Sweet but dangerous

Glass: Highball Glass
Garnish: A Cocktailberry on top
Shaken
2 cl Vodca
1 cl Bols Banana
1 cl Bols Blue
2 cl Black Sambuca
1 cl Cherry Liqueur
1 cl Lime Juice
Top Up with Sprite

Directions: Shake first six ingredients with ice and strain into ice-filled Highball glass. Top up with Sprite

The Cake is Not a Lie

Glass: Rocks Glass
Garnish: Strawberry Slices
Shaken
2 cl Whiskey
1 cl kahlua
1 cl Bols Brown Cacao
1 cl Cherry Liqueur
1 cl Bols Strawberry
Top Up with Double Heavy Cream

Directions: Shake all ingredients with ice and strain into ice-filled Rocks glass. Top up with Cream

The Drink is a Lie

Glass: Chilled Martini Glass
Garnish: As Much as possible
Cheap beer

Directions: Start getting a Martini glass. Put some Fancy garnish on it. Get a cheap beer from the fridge. Pour it into the fancy-made glass while the customer sees it and serve. Tell the Costumer that of course there is beer in it, as the drink was a lie.

Teleportation shot
Jump from one shot to the other

Glass: 2 shot glasses
Garnish:

First Glass
2 cl Gold Tequila
1 cl Orange Juice

Second Glass
2 cl lime juice or Roses lime
1 cl Bol Blue

Directions: Pour ingredients in the 2 shot glasses. Tell the costumer to start from the yelow one and end with the blue shooter

The Nintendo Wii is on a roll. Here is another game that is going to be for the shiny white console that isn't about puppies, but rather the murder and raping of puppies (metaphorically). This boxart and screenshot gallery for Tenchu 4 (aka: Tenchu: Shadow Assassins) is pretty pleasing to the eye, but then again anything that includes ninjas makes me giddy.

Tenchu 4 will include all things ninja; stealth ,slaughter, and tasty, tasty blood. All of the shots show promise of the game being like the old-style Tenchu games. It's slated for release early in 2009. 

I love it when the Nintendo Wii gets a game that isn't cute and fuzzy, but demented and completely disgusting. The upcoming House of the Dead: Overkill will feature half-dead doctors, clowns, mutants and other scary things that'd you'd rather not come across in the dark. Sega's shooter will quench my zombie blood-lust since I have already ran through Left 4 Dead about 50 times. The repetitive gameplay in this shooter won't be so bad because there will at least be un-lockable extras.

Enjoy the exciting and bloody screenshots.

It's cute to see Bungie decked out in the holiday spirit. No, they may not be dressed as elves, running around the office giving out corny sweaters and thick, woolen socks... but they are dishing out something pretty sweet. A new shot from the new Halo 3 map, "Orbital" has been released by the Bungie Santa.

Bungie Santa also says that Halo 3: ODST is now playable from beginning to end in their holiday test labs. What does that mean for you? Well a short sleigh ride to the nearest retailer!

The Sims 3 is now not just about locking your child Sim into a room with only a toilet and letting is suffer; your Sims are now completely customizable!

You can choose up to five personality traits for your Sims out of 60 to choose from. The brand-new, goal-oriented game play lets you choose long- or short-term objective goals for your Sims so that you're actually aiming towards a goal instead of mindless gameplay.

So, to summarize:

-Customize the ultimate Sim by choosing up to five traits from more than 60; you can also choose numerous body characteristics in the Create-a-Sim feature. Your Sims body type, facial features, and hairstyles are completely customizable, but that is only the beginning. Want a Sim the looks like Scarlett Johansson? Well if you have enough patience, it can be a reality.

-As with the last one, you can control what your Sim will "grow up to be." Only now, there are some better professions and you get a little more say in what they do. I really hope there is a "Slutty Pirate" or "High Class Hooker" profession.

-You can customize everything in the Sims 3 from clothing to houses to pets to furniture. By changing the patterns and colors of your environment, you can make it look exactly like the house you live in now! Only minus the questionable family values!

February '09 is going to be a great time for shunning family members and living a fake life through the Sims 3. 

I have a feeling that Santa works at Eidos.10 brand new screenshots for Batman: Arkham Asylum have been released to us; I can't determine if this is an early Christmas or Festivus present. Although the screenshots are given to us now, you'll have to wait until next year sometime for the game to be released on Xbox 360, PlayStation3, and PC.

The Chronicles of Riddick: Assault on Dark Athena is the makings of a very beautiful game that I just might consider buying. These screenshots show just how movie-quality this game is. Vin Diesel might have lent his face to something that is worthwhile after all. (Does anyone remember The Pacifier?)

Remember that not only is Assault on Dark Athena an expansion of Escape From Butcher Bay, but it could probably be considered an entirely separate game since it is 10+ hours of campaign. The engine and graphics are much better in Athena compared to Butcher Bay. Just look at dem goggles! How they shine. 

I wonder if it is weird that I want to eat Vin Diesel he is so hot. Nom.

On January 6th, Feral Interactive will be releasing the Mac version of Black & White 2. Black & White 2 is the RTS sequel to Black & White. This game of controlling gods and monsters was one of the top-selling Mac games of all time. Black & White 2 was created by Lionhead Studios and designed by Peter Molyneux and Ron Millar.

Basically, you'll be a god looking for followers who has control of one, giant-ass monster. You can perform miracles... but on the other hand your can make your monster down right evil. But instead of being back in the stone age, weapons have been invented and humans have more power than ever. The Battle of the Gods makes this situation even stickier with the inclusion of a rival god.

Mac owners can pick up this shit for $50 at the nearest retailer. The sole reason I play this game is to torture the citizens of Eden with my giant ass monkey, cow, or tiger.

But... I'm not a nice person. :)

Everyone knows that the previews for prototype are ass-kicking awesome. (CLICK!)

Now at the Prototype website, there is a countdown clock activated. What is it counting down to? Christmas? My birthday? The game's release??? Prototype website!!!

In 19+ days, something will happen with this shapeshifter who is locked down in New York. Probably not the release...but something awesome. A demo? 

It may not be obvious to you non-WoW players... but it looks to me like al-Zaidi isn't at the hit cap yet. I know my DK in Northrend would kick the shit out of Bush. I'm being completely bipartisan here. I just rock.

I know how all of you kiddies love screenshots of stuff and Street Fighter IV... and it just so happens that I have a prime combination of those two variables! Although you know the character list (Abel, Akuma, Balrog, Blanka, Cammy, Chun-Li, Crimson Viper, Dan, Dhalsim, E. Honda, El Fuerte, Fei-Long, Gen, Gouken, Guile, Ken, M. Bison, Rose, Rufus, Ryu, Sagat, Sakura, Seth, Vega, and Zangief) here are some big shots of them. The pictures go in order as well.

Rock Band is giving us early Christmas presents! ... well you're going to have to pay for this DLC, so it's the bad kind of present. It's like fruitcake that you end up choking on. But seeing that it is a present nonetheless...

On December 23 (the same day GHWT is getting its DLC!) Rock Band will have 3 holiday-themed tracks available for download:

Barenaked Ladies - "Hanukkah Blessings"

Billy Squier - "Christmas is the Time To Say I Love You"

The Pretenders - "Blue Christmas"

You can buy each track separately for 80MS points each or you can spend 240MS points for the three-song pack.

Have a happy holiday season! :)

The Steam digital distribution service does everything I need; it lets me sit in one spot and play video games all day. Now, EA is using the service to distribute a lineup of their games as well. More titles will be appearing in later weeks, but for now there are still some worthwhile titles:

Spore

Spore Creepy & Cute Parts Pack

Warhammer Online: Age of Reckoning

Mass Effect

Need for Speed Undercover

EA Sports' FIFA Manager 2009

Coming soon:

Mirror's Edge

Red Alert 3

Dead Space

EA was questioned to find out whether older PC games would be available on Steam as well, but EA was stingy with the amount of information they gave out. 

Finally, the Wii's balls are dropping, its getting acne and hiding pornographic magazines underneath its bed. The publisher Take Two is going to bring some mature content to the Wii and Wii think that the Wii will like it.

Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars will test the more mature waters for Nintendo Wii; if the numbers are great after its release we might be seeing some more violent, bloody, mature games released for the Wii.  

Bully and Manhunt 2 were released but didn't have impressive sales numbers... but then again, Bully and Manhunt 2 are NOT GTA. I'm convinced that a Grand Theft Auto game could be released in poker-card format and it would do well.  

So will GTA: CW overcome the challenges with the Wiimote? Will Grand Theft Auto feel right with me swinging my arms around like a slippery hooker? Ohhh I hope so. My Wii needs some loving too. So bring on the M titles!

Duke Nukem Forever screenshots are just the holiday treat I was looking for. 3D Realms has provided a completely free screenshot of the new Duke game and I got to say that if I had a penis it might be causing me problems right about now. This thing is sexy. I mean, I would make sweet, sweet love to it. I will be dreaming of these guys, especially pig-face, when I sleep tonight.

They are better than sugar plums or whatever I'm supposed to be dreaming about.

The revamped Street Fighter IV is going to be so badass. Not only will we be seeing Ryu, Ken, Chun-Li and Guile again, but also we will be seeing them in stylized 3D as well as the classic Street Fighter 2D perspective with 3D camera extras.

The following screenshots should show you how special this new Street Fighter will be. It is going to be retro and innovative all at once. Although it doesn't give any hints as to how the controls will really feel, it does kind of give the feeling for the new game. The characters for this new Street Fighter (although not all pictured) are: Abel, Akuma, Balrog, Blanka, Cammy, Chun-Li, Crimson Viper, Dan, Dhalsim, E. Honda, El Fuerte, Fei-Long, Gen, Gouken, Guile, Ken, M. Bison, Rose, Rufus, Ryu, Sagat, Sakura, Seth, Vega, and Zangief. 

If you're having a New Years Eve party this year, I hope that you have Guitar Hero World Tour to play. GHWT is getting a slew of new songs before the New Year. On December 23, songs from Hinder ("Use me" and "Take It To the Limit"), Nickelback ("Because of You") and Rev Theory ("Light It Up") will be made available. As a person who is an avid rock fan, this is good news.

On the other hand, GHWT is also getting some country; the Country Rock Track Pack will feature Rascal Flatts, Brad Paisley, and Brooks & Dunn.

But wait! There's more! Former Blink 182 drummer Travis Barker is going to release a three-song track back on January 15^th. The three tracks are "What's My Age Again," "Lycanthrope," and "Low."

The brand new Sims 3 that is due out in 2009 is going to feature some pretty cool additions to the familiar gameplay. The new and improved Create-A-Sim will allow you to customize your Sim in both physical and emotional features. Now your Sim will be a unique douche or bitch!

The tool is more powerful than ever; the levels of customization have never been explored before. You can specify every aspect of your Sims' face, hair color, and skin tone so that you can actually make a Sim that looks like YOU. Or someone else that you have been stalking for months that works at the local Blimpies. 

So we didn't give you the full scoop on the Metal Gear Solid download for LittleBigPlanet. We're sorry... but this update is completely fantastic so I think you'll be in a forgiving mood.

Sackboys and girls, you are getting guns!. Paintball guns specifically, but who cares. The point is that you will be able to launch projectiles! After downloading this Metal Gear Solid data, you will be able to do battle with enemies and friends using paintball guns. You can even earn Trophies regarding the miscellaneous shenanigans you can get into with the level pack download.

One specific Trophy is worth mentionting: Rexecutioner. It is awarded after you take on a mini version of Metal Gear REX.

PLEASE let this be available before Christmas!!!

Sometimes Aussies get all of the luck. They get Hugh Jackman. (Having Nicole Kidman is a bit of bad luck but...)

In a surprising bit of news, it was announced that Australians are blood-thirsty zombie killers. (Okay, well maybe not in those exact words.) The Australian Classifications Board, who are famous for being uptight tarts, labeled Resident Evil 5 as an MA 15+ classification with a caution of strong violence. !!!

So not only are they labeling RE5 as a little pussy game that most kids can play but they also retracted their earlier "refused classification" status for FEAR 2. That's right Australia! GIVE IN TO THE VIOLENCE!

Resident Evil 5 will be released on March 13, 2009 in Australia.

Are you a pirate, but shudder at the thought of committing an actual crime? Yarrrrr!

Maxis, in order to get around some digital rights issues, created a De-Authorization Tool to be used with your Spore account and game disc. In official language, "By running the de-deauthorization tool, a machine 'slot' will be freed up on the online Product Authorization server and can then be re-used by another machine."

"You can de-authorize at any time, even without uninstalling Spore, and free up that machine authorization. If you re-launch Spore on the same machine, the game will attempt to re-authorize. If you have not reached the machine limitation, the game will authorize and the machine will be re-authorized using up one of the five available machines."

Basically, what it means is that if you want to share your game with friends (or perhaps borrow it from a friend), you can do so in a perfectly legal way. You can share your Spore disc up to 5 times and still be able to log onto your account without getting yelled at by the FBI, or whoever takes care of crap like that.

The tool is available at www.spore.com.

Eager for Bioshock 2? Well no worries, children, it is going to be released in 2009. Its publisher, Take-Two, should have a very good year next year regarding game releases. The CEO of Take-Two, Ben Feder, said, "We're excited about our 2009 pipeline, which will include [many titles]...as well as new offerings from such powerful franchises as BioShock, Mafia and the 2K Sports roster.

The original Bioshock hinted at the development of BioShock 2 through the PlayStation 3's ending. The second installment, subtitled "Sea of Dream", although announced in October has no official information regarding what platforms will receive it.

It would be safe to assume that it'll show its face on the Xbox 360 and at some point on the PS3... but you know what they say about people who assume. You make an ass out of you and me.

Yes. I am 85.

I love that the nation has gotten into an "exercise via video game consoles" trend... but I have yet to see a game that really keeps me hooked. Yeah, I weigh myself everyday on Wii Fit but am I exercising hard? Not really.

Now a Wii exercise game about pole dancing? I would definitely play that shit night and day. Why? 1.) I need to learn how to be sluttier and 2.) my obliques need some serious work. Back when the game originally thought of, no one really believed that people would actually go through with it since it was about pole dancing... but think again! There have been plans announced plans to create the pole dancing game. For real.

A representative for Peekaboo (the pole dancing game) told MTV that the company was looking for people to develop and distribute it. The actual pole peripheral, though, is well on its way in development!

"We have, however, connected with a company that is manufacturing a peripheral product and we are investigating mutual publishing opportunities."

Start your engines boys, because as soon as this game is developed I'm going to be the sexiest pole dancer you ever did see.

You may not be able to play the official demo for Resident Evil 5 yet, but you can sit and stare at the box art for a few hours (which I plan to do). It looks awesome, of course. The worldwide release of the official demo is set for early in 2009 so I hope these pictures will keep you busy. It isn't like you'd have to wait long to play it after the demo is over anyway; the game will be released on March 13^th, 2009.

So enjoy the box art and screenshots of Hunky and Mrs. Hunky as they battle off hordes of African zombies!

We aren't so sure why or how, but Lionhead Studios is going to need a bit more time before it releases the exciting, new Knothole Island to the Fable world. According to the Knothole Island expansion's Xbox page, it won't be available next week (as previously scheduled). Because of some technical difficulties, the expansion will be released sometime in January of 2009.

There isn't one game this year that I wanted to play that HASN'T had a delay associated with it. Here is a tip, game development companies... if you don't think the game will be completed in X amount of time, don't say it will be.. okay? Quit breaking my heart!!

Just recently, Sega officially announced the existence of the downloadable game, OutRun Online Arcade. This game has been confirmed for the XBLA and PSN. Sumo Digital of the UK is developing the game and will hopefully have it ready for release in early 2009.

You will get what you expect to in any racing game- a ton of courses and fast cars. The game will have 15 courses from different areas in the United States and 10 different, licensed Ferrari cars to abuse. As for multiplayer, there are three different modes that up to 6 players can compete in together.

So pop in your very worn copy of Fast and the Furious and make "vroom vroom" noises until 2009... then you can download OutRun Online Arcade and race your friends.

United Football, a football (read: soccer) MMO, is in beta and it has attracted a very solid fan base from both the America's and the United Kingdom. The online football/soccer game is lined up for release sometime in 2009.

The gamers that will primarily be targeted by advertising for United Football will be gamers in the UK, US, German, Austrian, Swiss and Portuguese markets. This is essentially every country that is interested in soccer and has money to buy it... and then the US.

What will make the football/soccer MMO so impressive is the unique control system it has and perspective that puts the gamer right in the center of the action. Each member of the team you will be on is going to be a live gamer and not a CPU. This is the "MMO" part of the game and will make the sports gameplay that much more exciting. You'll also be able to chat with your buddies as you play... or swear at them, whatever is normal for you while you're playing sports.

I myself am a douche.

That Paradox Interactive dev team has been working hard on the third installment of the Hearts of Iron series. We even have screenshots!

If you don't know, the Hearts of Iron series has been very popular for being the biggest and most detailed complete strategic game focused on World War 2. It's like what Call of Duty or Medal of Honor is for WWII, only it is a strategy game. The third Hearts of Iron is going to focus on some brand new features and systems. One of which is a enormous map with more than 10,000 provinces.

It's estimated that Hearts of Iron 3 is will be released in Q3, 2009.

Look! Free shit!

If you own an iPhone, an Xbox 360 and $0 you are in luck. There is a new application created by 1337pwn.com that lets you integrate your iPhone life with your Xbox 360 life. The deal of all deals is the iNXES Xbox Live Friends application.

Let me explain: this application imitates your NXE (New Xbox Experience) friends panel. You can flip through your active and inactive friends just like you do on your Xbox 360 now. The free application you can download even supports the new Xbox 360 Avatars and you can check out the top Xbox Live games.

No go be savy, mobile people!

We've got the low down on who is playing who in the new Batman game, Batman: Arkham Asylum.

It has been confirmed by both Eidos and Warner Bros. that Mark Hamill (aka. Luke Skywalker) is going to be the voice of The Joker in the game. He also played The Joker in Batman: The Animated Series.

The bat man will be played by Kevin Conroy, another actor who has some experience with this role as well. Conroy was the voice of Batman in multiple animated series and video games. 

The Resident Evil 5 demo that was available for Japanese gamers that was taken shortly down after its release will be stateside soon. Capcom said that early in 2009 the US will officially get the RE5 demo.

Last night in San Francisco, Capcom held a Resident Evil 5 co-op multiplayer event. At said event, the information was released regarding the demo in 2009. People at certain events have viewed and even played the demo so I am going to ask the obvious question...

Why can't we download this bad boy NOW? 

Back at the Tokyo Game Show 2008, the new "old" Snake SackBoy costume was revealed. I'm happy to tell you that you might be playing as a little Snake pretty soon. The Sony Hong Kong PlayStation site is listing a Metal Gear Solid costume pack for LBP along with a level pack. Oh snap!

You can download Old Snake, Meryl, and Screaming Mantis separately, but if you buy the set you'll also get Raiden from Metal Gear Solid 4. It isn't clear when the States will be getting the level packs and costumes but never fear; with the holidays looming in the near future, Sony might be guilted into providing them on the Thursday before Christmas.

If you're like me, as a high class hooker, you dress the part. Businessmen don't want a quickie from someone who looks like a transvestite. As a enthusiastic gamer, I want my NXE avatar to represent me accurately!

Thank GOD Microsoft came out with some high class threads for your avatars in the new dashboard. I'm not sure what I would have done without my formal trouser suit! When men ask for a dirty Hillary, I give them a dirty Hillary.

Gentlemen

Blue Tuxedo

Black Tuxedo

Shirt with Cummerbund

Black Trilby

Bowler Hat

Noble Women

Elegant Ball Gown

Little Black Dress

Formal Trouser Suit

Elegant Watch

Red '60s Shades

Strappy High Heels

Platform Shoes

Are you interested in some free, albeit geeky, gaming? Well, my poor friends look no more. The beta for Runes of Magic is now open to all players and the game can be downloaded free of charge after a short registration on www.runesofmagic.com.

Now you might be thinking... why the hell would I want to play this game?

As a loyal MMORPG fan and slave to World of Warcraft, I know that these games can be pretty addictive. At first glance it might look like a nerdy world of role-playing and witchcraft lusting, but it's honestly a great way to waste time and avoid speaking to family members.

Over 100,000 characters were created in the first few hours of the Runes of Magic beta; Taborea is practically packed. Frogster opened another game world on Monday afternoon so that more gamers could get on the servers.

So what are you waiting for? Try it out, you know you'll like it. That bitch with the blue hair in the lower right is pretty hot.

Zeno Clash, the PC-based action/fighting game that is set in a punk fantasy world, looks a little fucked up if I'm being completely honest. And I am.

The description of the storyline alone would make anyone think twice about playing this game: you will play as Ghat, the son of a hermaphrodite creature called Father-Mother. The children of said hermaphrodite form the most powerful clan in the city of Halstedom. As Ghat, you need to escape from your demented family with your lady-friend.

After it is released in early 2009, you'll be able to get the game via Steam, Valve's digital distribution system or at a normal retailer. Zeno Clash attempts to blend a first person game with a fighting game with a nightmare. Not only will you have a closet of melee attacks to use on your opponents but you will have weapons and tools as well.

These concept art photos beautifully combine Zeno's nightmarish storyline and style. Enjoy?

Stormrise, if you remember, is an innovative RTS console title made for the Xbox 360 and PS3 that is probably going to be shipped sometime in 2009. You will be thrown into a hot, tense battlefield and you must lead your troops from the front line. Your first-hand experience on the battlefield will be intensified by the control system made specifically for the two consoles.

Stormrise is set on a destroyed earth. The remnants of a technological people, the Echelon, survived the horrors through self-hibernations. The Sai, a more tribal faction, had to adapt to their new, brutal surroundings. The two different races are now battling the shit out of each other for dominance in this new world.

Bloodshed? Uh yes.

If the screens of this game aren't enough, get more info at: http://www.sega.com/stormrise

Scratch: the Ultimate DJ has some new screenshots floating around that are truly representative of the game's exciting nature. It's like Guitar Hero... only minus the guitars! Wow!

7 Studios, Numark (the DJ equipment company), hip-hop producer Quincy Jones III, Genius Products and Genco Interactive are progressing quite nicely with the development of their DJ Guitar Hero-esque game. I can't say I'm excited to run out and buy a turntable peripheral so that I can pretend to be all ghetto and cool... but you might just be one of those people who would be.

The ridiculously sexy Brooke and Destiny from OnHerCam sent us these pictures from their recent romp in a hotel room. Not sure what they were doing there, but it probably involved a lot of boobs. And apparently a little bit of gaming. Or fake gaming. Whatever, I don't care. Check these out in full size by clicking them.

Oh, and check back soon because I'll be posting the rest of them in the near future. There will fortunately be less clothing although I'm a little sad they ripped those very well-made GameRecoil.com shirts.

I'm glad to see that Sony is in holiday spirits!

LittleBigPlanet level packs will be arriving soon at the PlayStation Store. Said level packs were mentioned briefly at the Spike VGAs and I'm glad to see things being set in motion so that I can get my grubby hands on them. It's approximated that each will run you $2.99, which isn't bad considering one gallon of gas cost that earlier this year.

The first level pack that you'll be able to download this Thursdays is the Festive Level Pack. You'll get two new costumes, one new create material, two new objects, six new decorations and new stickers from the $2.99 you'll be paying for this pack. The level pack will only remain in-store until January 8, 2009.

So do me a favor and send me $3 so I can download this puppy for Christmas.

Today, inXile entertainment bought the online puzzle game, Fantastic Contraption (http://www.fantasticcontraption.com/). This game was created by an independent developer by the name of Colin Northway. It was first released online in July 2008 and currently almost three million people have visited the site.

Why should this interest you? Because of the acquisition of Fantastic Contraption, you can now expect it to be cropping up on a different platform (like the iPhone, for instance). An iPhone application is being planned for this holiday season. Although I don't own an iPhone myself, I will have some serious jealousy brewing when that application is released.

To be quite simple: puzzle games rock and puzzles games would rock on my phone. How else will I waste time in line at the free clinic waiting to get tested for the clap?

If you have an internet connection so that you can connect to the PlayStation Store or the Xbox Live Marketplace, I would suggest doing so immediately. All players can unlock the Time Trial mode in the recently released demo. By typing in any 16 digit code (i.e. 0000-0000-0000-000) any gamer can download the Time Trial on the demo.

In order to unlock the Time Trial mode, you will need to select Race > Play Time Trial in the main menu of the demo. After you get past those menus, enter the code and you are all set. Unlocking this game mode works with already downloaded versions of the demo as well. What you do during the time trials is run through the city as fast as you possibly can in Faith's parkour-style run. You can upload your best time to the game's leaderboards. Your friends can then download and compete against your ghosts.

The demo you're going to be downloading (if you haven't done so already) includes the beginning of the game, a tutorial and several parts of the Time Trial mode.

The employees at Rare must not have much to do during this economic crisis; they elected to put their skills to good use and photoshop pinatas from Viva Pinata into a variety of famous movie scenes. I'm not complaining, though, I love parodies. I got to say my favorite is A Clockwork Pinata.

1 Blitz the League II

2 Dead Space

3 Fallout 3

4 Far Cry 2

5 Gears of War 2

6 Left 4 Dead

7 Legendary

8 Resistance 2

9 Saints Row 2

10 Silent Hill: Homecoming

If you're like me, this list of "Most Violent Video Games" will not deter you from buying these video games... if anything it will urge you to go out and buy those games now. Numbers 3, 5, 6, and 8 all have my interest and knowing that they were bloody enough to piss off Detroit prosecutor Kym Worthy makes me want to buy them even more.

But this isn't just a laughing matter; Worthy's list has been used by the Thai government to ban several video games after a murder of a cab driver several months ago. I can't imagine the American government using this list to ban games but...who can say what will happen under the new regime of a man who hasn't played a video game since Pong.

Combat Arms (http://combatarms.nexon.net), the free-to-play FPS multiplayer online video game, is getting a massive update for the holidays. This update is set to launch on December 16 and will have plenty of goodies that'll make your gaming experience better. It will include a new game mode ("Spy Hunt"), the Elite Moderator item (so that you can kick douches out of matches), and the ability to make a character from six different base models.

Spy Hunt mode includes a two-part assignment to recover secret plans for a WMD. There are two separate parts to this mission that you will get to partake in.

The Elite Moderator item gives players the new ability to host a private Combat Arms "server." With this feature, you can monitor your own game server and kick out abusive players; this is much more efficient than just raping them in-game until they leave.

Players can also purchase new items with the in-game currency, Gear Points (GP), or with real money through Nexon Cash (NX Cash). If you're feeling festive, you can buy up some Christmas-themed items and new weapons to send to friends through a newly added gifting feature.

Although Combat Arms is unknown to me (even though it has over a million players), it looks like it is deserving of some attention, especially with this new update. So if you're looking to play a new game that is free and full of guns, check out Combat Arms.

Freaky Creatures by Abandon Interactive Entertainment might be a game only my ten year old niece would like, but there are some things I want to point out that make me a little interested in it. The game combines MMO PC gaming, collectible action figures, virtual worlds and social networking. Considering that it is looking to combine all of these very popular aspects of entertainment, I'm willing to pay attention to this.

In Freaky Creatures, you'll be able to choose different powers, defenses and weapons to adorn your creature with so that it is extremely badass. When you win a battle, you will receive a random power from your opponent and also Creature Credits. Creature Credits are used to buy parts, powers and objects for your creature. At this point I must point something out - doesn't this sound a lot like Spore? Create a creature, kill things, and gain points to build a better creature? Of course, the creatures in Spore didn't set up a Mortal Kombat-like style fighting system.

One last thing that makes me scratch my noggin is that this MMO game comes on a reusable USB flash drive and is bundled with two collectable action figures... all for $19.99.

I have no idea what purpose Megan Fox served at the 2008 Spike TV Video Game Awards, but who's complaining? She serves a purpose everywhere - the dinner table, AIDS benefits, the circus, a three-legged race. Where ever.

Check out the ridiculous images of Megan by clicking the thumbnails below for the higher resolution versions. It could cause arousal in your pants region.

Gamers who are hardcore probably don't give the Wii the time of day. It's true that the Nintendo console sticks to games that are cute and/or not filled with blood (most of the time). The WiiWare titles usually follow along in the same trend and can be a little boring. But in the spirit of the holidays, I think we should give the Wii a chance.

The official website for Evasive Space has been launched at www.evasivespace.com; Evasive Space is a top-down space adventure title for WiiWare. You'll use your Wiimote to pilot Konki through deep space (albeit a bright version of deep space) and fight baddies. Now it might not be the most challenging game you'll play all year, but it does look neat for WiiWare.

Game features:

You'll guide Konki through 20 different space time and collection based missions in 4 different worlds

Wave your arms around to control Konki with the Wiimote.

Pick up items and ship upgrades

Six different four person multiplayer matches locally on your home console

Compete for best times on the Nintendo online leaderboards.

After the third installment of God of War, it looks like Sony will be putting the franchise to rest. Kratos, what are you going to do without brutal beheadings of your enemies? What will I do when I can no longer watch it?

But it looks like the third in the series will be going out with a bang. According to Sony, the game will have four times the texture resolution seen in the second God of War. Not only that, but the dynamic lighting will be better and the onscreen enemy numbers will greatly increase.

So if this means the game will be tougher, bloodier and manlier then ...go ahead Sony, make it the last. It's all we'll need. 

I've been playing Fallout 3 so much that it is safe to assume that I will always hear Three Dog's voice in my dreams. I'm sure PS3 gamers share the same opinion, although theirs is slightly tarnished.

The PS3 version of the game lacked Trophy support and had a few annoying bugs which were related to system notifications. The game would freeze or run particularly slowly whenever a notification popped up. If you were a PS3 gamer, my guess is that you turned the notifications off completely so you could get through some playtime without the game freezing on you.

Now, these issues have been resolved in a patch that was released for Fallout 3; not only were the notification issues addressed, but the patch adds full Trophy support. A majority of the Trophies resemble the Xbox 360 achievements, but that doesn't mean they should pop up during gameplay as shitty replicas. Thank goodness for the patch, children!

Pearl Jam's Ten, their debut album that sold 12+ million copies and in 1991, will be available for download in the Rock Band Music Store. The Rock Band album will be available for purchase along with the re-issuing of Ten in stores on March 24, 2009.

"Just hearing the first few notes of Jeremy or Alive brings back all the raw emotion of this incredible, hugely important album. We are honored to be working with Pearl Jam to deliver Ten as it is re-issued," says Paul DeGooyer, Senior Vice President of Electronic Games and Music for MTV Networks Music.

The Pearl Jam Ten download pack will include these 10 songs from their album:

1. Once

2. Even Flow

3. Why Go

4. Black

5. Jeremy

6. Oceans

7. Porch

8. Garden

9. Deep

10. Release

So The Last Remnant didn't exactly wow us when it was originally released on the Xbox 360; although Famitsu claimed that it was going to be a sexy new game by Square Enix, there was a lot left to be desired with the graphics and gameplay.

But now the makers of the Final Fantasy franchise are releasing The Last Remnant for PC in Spring 2009. The real-time fantasy world might appeal more to the PC gamer; players control forces in massive cinematic battles in RT. This seems more up the PC gamers alley; Xbox 360 gamers usually are so immersed in the desire to kill things in an FPS that controlling real-time battles may seem boring.

More information on The Last Remnant can be found at: www.lastremnant-game.com.

If you didn't get a chance to watch the trailer for the upcoming Grand Theft Auto DLC, the Lost and the Damned, here are some screenshots that should whet your appetite. The DLC focuses not around the familiar face we saw in GTA IV, but Johnny Klebitz, who is a Liberty City biker gang member. I'm not complaining though. I want to see me and my homies rollin' deep and smacking some bitches around... biker gangs always get the best trim.

Sega and Platinum games are making a great game for the Wii (aka: one I won't be ashamed to admit that I play). Mad World, in its black and white splendor, takes gore to the Wii. All of these screenshots show a few things: 1. Black and white games are sexy 2. Black and white games are sexy with strikingly bright blood 3.Gamers love violence. Hmm... I feel like I have seen this videogame before.

"Of course we like Sin City very much and we have seen Running Man before but they are not the sources of our creation," said Inaba, the creator of Mad World. "The concepts of MadWorld are 'visual impact' and 'over-the-top violence,' and these two themes run right through the game."

Ahh, I thought that the black and white graphics looked a little familiar.

Here is a rumoriffic list of potential release dates for European Nintendo titles. It's impossible to find a concrete source for this list, so take it with a grain of salt. Or sand. However the saying goes.

Chrysler Classic Racing (ZOO) 9 Jan 2009

Jeep Thrills (formerly Let's Off Road) (ZOO) -9 Jan 2009

Army Men: Soldiers of Misfortune (ZOO) - 16 Jan 2009

Skate City Heroes (ZOO) - 16 Jan 2009

Story Hour Adventures (ZOO) - 16 Jan 2009

Story Hour Fairy Tales (ZOO) - 16 Jan 2009

NeoPets Puzzle Adventure (Capcom) - 23 Jan 2009

Twin Strike: Operation Thunder (ZOO) - Jan 2009

Riding Stables (dtp young entertainment) - Jan 2009

Music Party (dtp young entertainment) - Jan 2009

Ultimate Band (Capcom)- 5 Feb 2009

NEW PLAY CONTROL! Pikmin (Nintendo)- 6 Feb 2009

Hotel For Dogs (505 Games)- 6 Feb 2009

NARUTO Clash of Ninja Revolution 2 European Version (TOMY / Nintendo) - 13 Feb 2009

Deadly Creatures (THQ)- 13 Feb 2009

CM 2 - World Kitchen (505 Games)- 20 Feb 2009

The Destiny of Zorro (505 Games)- 27 Feb 2009

House of the Dead: Overkill (SEGA)- Feb 2009

Ben 10: Alien Force (D3Publisher)- Feb 2009

Onechanbra-Bikini Zombi Slayers (D3Publisher)- Feb 2009

Mushroom Men: The Spore Wars (SouthPeak Games)- Feb 2009

Pirates versus Ninja (SouthPeak Games)- Feb 2009

CID The Dummy (Oxygen Games)- Feb 2009

Tenchu Shadow Assassins (Ubisoft)- 5 Mar 2009

Yamaha Supercross (ZOO)- 6 Mar 2009

Big Foot Collision Course (ZOO)- 6 Mar 2009

Diva Girls: Princess on Ice (505 Games)- 6 Mar 2009

Smiley World Island Challenge (ZOO)- 13 Mar 2009

Jelly Belly Ballistic Beans (ZOO)- 13 Mar 2009

Sim Animals (EA) - 23 Mar 2009

Little Kings Story (Rising Star Games)- 28 Mar 2009

NEW PLAY CONTROL! Mario Power Tennis (Nintendo)- Mar 2009

Sonic and the Black Knight (SEGA)- Mar 2009

MADWORLD (SEGA)- Mar 2009

Diabolik: The Original Sin (Black Bean /Lago Srl)- Mar 2009

Bob the Builder: Festival of Fun (Mastertronic)- Mar 2009

AMF Bowling World Lanes (Bethsofteurope)- Q1 2009

Runaway The Dream of the Turtle (Focus Home Interactive)- Q1 2009

Job Island (Hudson Soft)- Q1 2009

Kororinpa 2 (working title) (Hudson Soft)- Q1 2009

King of Fighters Collection: The Orochi Saga. (Ignition)- Q1 2009

Samurai Shodown Anthology (Ignition)- Q1 2009

Jillian Michaels Fitness Ultimatum 2009 (Koch Media / Deep Silver)- Q1 2009

Castlevania Judgment (Konami)- Q1 2009

PES 2009 (Konami)- Q1 2009

Cake Mania - In the Mix ! (Majesco/Codemasters)- Q1 2009

Escape The Museum (Majesco/Codemasters)- Q1 2009

Rock Revolution (Konami)- Q1 2009

Hysteria Hospital: Emergeny Ward (Oxygen Games)- Q1 2009

Roogoo (SouthPeak Games)- Q1 2009

Brave: A Warrior's Tale (SouthPeak Games)- Q1 2009

Line Rider 2: Unbound (InXile)- Q1 2009

PurrPals II (InXile)- Q1 2009

Hello, children!

The new Fallout 3 DLC that is due out in January will cost you $10, yes, but it will be filled with Anchorage goodness. You might wonder why there is an Anchorage War Memorial in Capital Wasteland; hopefully this DLC will shine some light on it.

Enjoy the screenshots, crusaders!

And you never thought that high school lit class would do you any good.

Electronic Arts Inc. recently announced that EA Redwood Shores (the geniuses behind Dead Space) are making a Dante's Inferno game. Just to be extremely clear, this will be a third-person action adventure adaptation of the epic poem The Divine Comedy by Dante Alighieri.

Now, if you slept through all of your classes in high school you may want to pay attention to this next bit- this poem formed the contemporary conception of hell and purgatory. This literary masterpiece tells the tale of Dante who journeys through the completely fucked up nine circles of hell in pursuit of his beloved Beatrice.

Those of who you aren't intellectuals may not realize how messed up hell is:

The eighth circle of hell is reserved for fraud and treachery. "Flatterers are steeped in human excrement. This is because their flatteries on earth were nothing but "a load of excrement" (Canto XVIII)." Having sinners buried in shit is just one part of hell, by the way. There is whipping, tearing, gnashing and so on.

I have full confidence in EA Redwood Shores; I think that it is possible that this game could be scary, sick and beautiful all at once. I just hope they don't pussy out.

"The time is right for the world of interactive entertainment to adapt this literary masterpiece, and to re-introduce Dante to an audience that, until now, may have been unfamiliar with the remarkable details of this great work of art," said Jonathan Knight, executive producer for Dante's Inferno. "It's the perfect opportunity to fuse great gameplay with great story."

For more information on Dante's Inferno, please visit www.dantesinferno.com

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls! There is now a release date for Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars. This is the latest addition to the brutal GTA series and it is ultra portable on the DS; you can take your gang activity anywhere you go. Chinatown Wars will be available for the Nintendo DS on March 17 and 20, 2009 in North America and Europe, respectively.

Sam Houser, the founder of Rockstar Games, said "Rockstar Leeds have once again created a game that far exceeds our standard for deep and innovative entertainment. We are incredibly excited to share this enormous and uncompromising Grand Theft Auto experience with DS fans."

It will certainly be a unique experience; gamers will be creating havoc in Liberty City in DS fashion. Although it might not be Xbox 360 quality, killing thugs will still look good.

If you need more info on Chinatown Wars, check out this site: www.rockstargames.com/chinatownwars.

Gears of War 2 earned the Best Shooter and Best Xbox 360 Game awards last night at the SPIKE TV Video Game Awards, but that's not the only badass occurrence that took place last night. Microsoft Game Studios and Epic Games revealed footage from the brand-spanking-new Combustible Map Pack. The Combustible Map Pack is a collection of three new maps for Gears 2 and it is available the Xbox LIVE Marketplace for 800 MS Points. The three new multiplayer maps that you can pwn some douches on are Flood, Gold Rush and Fuel Station.

If you want to see the new maps in action, check out the trailer here!

Flood

This map is pretty tight and matters aren't helped by the Immulsion that creeps in throughout gameplay. Be extremely careful, because once the playing field closes in you'll be forced to be in close quarters with your enemies.

Gold Rush

This old Imulsion refinery map is pretty intense; not only are the multiple levels to this map but it can be dominated by either a Longshot rifle or Mortar rounds.

Fuel Station

This map is set up around a, you guessed it, fossil fuel station. If you're part of the team that dominates the fuel station, then you'll most likely be the winner of the match. Strategy is key for playing on this map. Keeping your team on a rooftop to do the killing from a safe distance

The maps included in the Combustible Map Pack are playable in the five player co-op Horde mode.

Bethesda Software has released fallout 3's official game editor, the G.E.C.K.. The G.E.C.K. (Garden of Eden Creation Kit) is THE tool for customization in Fallout 3. You can use it to create landscapes, towns, characters, weapons, and even dialogue. You can truly make Capital Wasteland YOURS by learning how to use the G.E.C.K..

You can find the G.E.C.K. Wiki online for tips and tricks; it is a pretty intense customization program so it is understandable that most of you are too much of pussies to know how to use it well. 


Now we have yet another way to live out our lives virtually and represent ourselves as the big-breasted brunette we wished we were; PS3's Home has launched!

If you want to find this enormous goodie, just restart your PS3 and you'll find the icon under the PlayStation Network section of the XMB. After you've done this, download the client and have fun!

Trust me, it's awesome. Don't make me slap you.

Although I can't guarantee that these Final Fantasy XIII trailers will stay up forever, get a good look at some of the things that this game will have to offer. I personally think it's beautiful and cannot wait to get my hands on it...

Watch FF13　DKΣ3713 in Game Videos  |  View More Free Videos Online at Veoh.com

Watch FF13 Versus DKΣ3713 in Game Videos  |  View More Free Videos Online at Veoh.com

I knew that game developers were strange, but those behind the creation of Deadly Creatures are confirmed to be not quite right in the head.

In order to get an idea of what spiders and scorpions were actually like, the developers actually spent some quality time with the arachnids. It's not like they could have looked in a fucking encyclopedia or anything. The team regularly handled scorpions, spiders and Billy Bob Thorton in order to get a good feel for how the game should work.

Not only that, but the crew took a little direct approach as well:

"We found a Mexican restaurant in Phoenix that serves Chapulinas, which are fried grasshoppers," said lead designer Jordan Itkowitz. "Chapulinas are kind of nutty, kind of crunchy. Better than giant Thai water beetles but not as good as fried mealworm larvae. Yes, this is speaking from experience... It was so we could really get into our characters' heads."

That game had better be good and win Emmys. Or whatever awards games get.

If you're one of those people who like to suffocate everyone around you with holiday cheer and festivities, then you'll love that Microsoft is offering a holiday-themed update for your New Dashboard Experience.

You can choose to download (both free) a winter theme for your dashboard AND a fun little snow globe. The snow globe will be filled with your friends' avatars... so it is both festive and cruel, which is my favorite combination. 

Don't look anywhere else for info on Guitar Hero: Metallica, because I've got the low down.

The stand-alone game is rumored to support the World Tour drum kit. It will even support the dual kick pedals that you would be using in the "expert plus" difficulty. The rumor mill spit out a few other tidbits as well, like included features such as a DVD-style bonus videos and extras; a "drum fill" mode for free-styling with Metallica drum sounds; Pop-up Video style performance footage; and guitar effects based on James Hetfield's ESP Truckster guitar and Tom Araya of Slayer's ESP bass.

Although not an offical list, here are some Metallica tracks we think will be included with the game:

Enter Sandman

For Whom The Bell Tolls

Fuel

Hit The Lights

King Nothing

Master of Puppets

No Leaf Clover

Nothing Else Matters

Sad But True

The Unforgiven

Where I May Roam

Other tracks that might crop up:

No Excuses - Alice in Chains

Turn The Page - Bob Seger

Hell Bent For Leather - Judas Priest

Demon Cleaner - Kyuss

Tuesday's Gone - Lynyrd Skynyrd

Blood and Thunder - Mastodon

Armed and Ready - Michael Schenker Group

Mother of Mercy - Samhain

Black River - The Sword

Epic games wants us all to have an early Christmas present (although this problem shouldn't have existed in the first place); they are releasing another Gears of War 2 patch that will reduce the long wait times players have been experiencing during matchmaking. 



Ever since the game's release, eager gamers have been waiting an obscene amount of time to get into multiplayer matches. Epic released a patch over the Thanksgiving... but with no apparent changes taking place. I'm not exactly an Xbox 360 technician BUT I do not think the first patch did anything. 

As of December 9, Epic finished their reconfiguration of the matchmaking server; this allowed more players per server. Along with the major update being released, this should fix most of the problems with the matchmaking waits.

But just to let you know, there will always be times when it takes more than just a minute to connect. Sometimes servers are busy. So be patient, douche.

Nothing gets me into the holiday spirit like drunken dwarves who are boasting about their accomplishments. In a weird way, it reminds me of Festivus back home.

Warhammer Online is hosting an online holiday event, Keg End. The holiday even will run from December 17th to January 5^th; the Dwarf New Year festival of Keg End is for the Order and Destruction armies alike. Both sides can earn rare drops and elite influence rewards.

Search for special beer during in-game pub crawls or if you're feeling particularly heroic, you can search for the legendary Golden Stein to earn the blessing of Grimnir. Some beer might be in it for you if you do.

The Keg End live event also introduces a new emote (/boast) to taunt your opponents. Nothing makes your mortal enemies crazy like drunken, dwarf boasting! I know my bitch of a girlfriend hates it. Not only that, but you can grab a free beer and /toast your buddies! You'll receive special Tome of Knowledge unlocks just for that.

So if you're just a little sick of family this holiday season and you want to celebrate your real passion (debauchery) sign on to Warhammer Online. 

Aurora is one of the sexier gamers out there...obviously. So we got her to show some skin in Saints Row 2 fashion for the site, and I must say, this definitely beats pretending to bang pixelated characters although that's fun, too. Check out the pictures below in full size by clicking the thumbnails.

Now Heavy Rain might sound like a poorly named pornographic movie, but it is actually a skillfully made masterpiece of a game with cutting edge graphics and a storyline that has depth. Some of the information that is floating around the Internet really gives the game character; for example, the script that was used for the game was about 2,000 pages long and featured about 60 different scenes (lasting about 15-20 minutes each).

The beaut' of a game is so long and nonlinear that it is practically impossible for you to see all of these scenes throughout the gameplay, but that just makes Fat Precipitation even more attractive. The motion capture was completed at Quantic Dreams' Paris studio; over 70 actors and stuntmen were involved.

Although all we have are screenshots, I'm betting they whet your appetite for this beautiful puzzler coming out in late 2009.

Are you sick and tired of being a 34-23-36 hottie night elf? Would you rather be a pudgy dwarf with skillz the killz? Blizzard now has a Character Re-Customization for $15 IRL. This service is similar to their character transfer service; for real money you can change things about your character. In this case, you would be changing the gender or appearance of your avatar for $15.

Unfortunately, you won't be able to change your character's race or class and if you wanted a name change it will cost you another $10. Overall, it's a pretty worthwhile deal.  

Fallout 3 is getting brand new DLC, "Operation Anchorage." The additional gameplay (4-5 hours of it) will cost you about 10 bones. The campaign is a simulation of the liberation of Anchorage. If you're a fan of Fallout then you'll know how orgasmic this will be. Communism and Chinese all in one fun DLC!

The objective will be to sneak into a Chinese base and you'll have new tools and equipment to help you through the mission. After this extended gameplay release, Bethesda has plans to increase the level cap with their third piece of DLC, Broken Steel.

Thanks for listening to me, chillllllldren!

Direct2Drive.com, a great spot to purchase and download titles online, now has Prince of Persia. If you've been a bit behind on the times, the game was created by the Ubisoft Montreal studio; it was the very same one that created Assassins Creed (you can even get Assassins Creed skins for your Prince).

If you own a PC, you won't have to venture outside to experience the new Prince, new storyline, new combat style, and completely unique graphics. Head to Direct2Drive.com and download it yourself!

Kiddies of all shapes and sizes, I have a bit of bad news for you. If you were hoping to receive Rygar: The Battle of Argus for Christmas this year, you're doing to be disappointed.

Although the game had a previous announcement of a December release date, but now Tecmo is delaying the game to... February 3. Ah yes, the dead of winter. So maybe they're not ready to let their little remake go into the big, bad world... but they have to let it be free sometime.

Somehow Wal-Mart has sold tens of thousands of Wiis early on Monday afternoon. Okay, when the shit did this happen? I'm still stuck with popping in and out of Wal-Mart on alternate Tuesdays when the moon is full just so I can try to get a Wii that is in stock. Now you're telling me that they are easier to come across than a college professor without a grasp on the real world?

A spokesperson for Wal-Mart, Ravi Jariwala, said something to the effect of the public had a very strong response to additional inventory. To be specific, that strong response was selling "tens of thousands" by "early Monday afternoon."

My question is... are there any left in stock? And if so, why am I here talking about it? I should be buying enough Wiis to make a throne. I hope that inventory hasn't run through Wal-Mart like a goose just yet.

Activision, Raw Thrills and Konami are going to be pumping out an arcade version of Guitar Hero . This amalgamation of companies will make arcades around the world just a little more addictive with a new big metal box with flashing lights and a toy guitar. Although it is pathetic, I have spent hours on Guitar Hero... and soon kids who can't afford an Xbox 360 (but do have gratuitous amounts of energy and quarters) can play in their local arcades.

A little bird by the name of MTV got some solid facts regarding the arcade game, the most notable being the arcade version will use the Guitar Hero 3 engine. 

If you're playing Far Cry 2, I have some very valuable information for you.

It just so happens that Intel has released two, free, downloadable missions for Far Cry 2 that together equal about three extra hours playing time. Three more hours of ignoring your girlfriend! Three more hours of microwave burritos!

Here are some official descriptions of the missions if you're interested:

"Mission 1: the Morrocan 

This mission sends you into the most heavily guarded region of the Leboa-Sako territory. Hiding out at the old Legion fort is a Moroccan who might be able to help you locate the Jackal. Your objective is to locate him and find out what he knows. 

Mission 2: the American 

Your predecessor has tracked down the American informant to the Dogon village in the rocky northern ranges. Your objective: follow his trail and find out what the informant told him."

Saw, a good movie with one too many sequels, is no longer having a video game made in its image. I'm not too sure if that is a good or bad thing. Although it would have been great to see some blood and gore on my Xbox 360 as a result of some Jigsaw shenanigans, we'll have no more luck.

Because Brash Entertainment is going through such hard times right about now, Saw: The Videogame is no more. Unless, that is, some other publisher can pick it up. If it wasn't for the axe swinging down, the game was supposed to be using the Unreal 3 engine, which I heard is the best for a violent and bloody massacre of a game. powered take on the sadistic series. 

Oh, ho! Are you ready for some holiday shopping opportunities? Well Natsume has a great holiday 2008 releases list to pick from.

Some of the titles that are available at retailers are Rune Factory 2: A Fantasy Harvest Moon, Harvest Moon: Island of Happiness, Princess Debut and Hi! Hamtaro: Ham-Ham Challenge. All of these games are for the Nintendo DS, but they aren't alone. Harvest Moon: Tree of Tranquility is for the Wii and joining its brethren on the shelves.  

Are you jonesing for some Halo, even sans Master Chief? Well the good news for you is that the release date for Halo Wars is March 3, 2009. Even though the series was the most profitable here in the states, Japan and Asia Pacific get Halo Wars first on February 26 and then Europe, the Middle East and Africa will get it on February 27. 



If you're feeling frisky, you can preorder the game and get signed up for a sexy in-game Warthog with decal flames on its sides. If that doesn't say, "you're my bitch!" then nothing will.

If the Warthog doesn't do enough for you, you can buy The Limited Collector's Edition of Halo Wars for a $20 increase ($79.99) and that comes with an in-game "Honor Guard" Covenant Wraith, a graphic novel, six Leader cards, and a "Spirit of Fire" patch. Also, those who buy the Limited Collector's Edition will get early access to the Halo 3 Mythic Map Pack. 

Billy Bob Thorton and Dennis Hopper aren't just award winner actors; apparently they're active voice actors as well. The new game Deadly Creatures for the Nintendo Wii are getting these hard-hitting actors to lend their voices.

Deadly Creatures isn't your normal cute Nintendo game being released in February 2009. It follows the lives of deadly creatures (duh) like snakes and scorpions. This game gets points for creativity.

"What surprised me about Deadly Creatures is how it looks... like watching a movie," said Billy Bob Thornton. "The scorpion and tarantula are like two actors meeting up for a gun fight." 



"Gamers are really going to love Deadly Creatures," added Dennis Hopper. 



Going through a game as a scorpion or spider definitely is unique and with the addition of Billy Bob and Dennis it'll make it extra appealing. Unless you're afraid of snakes and scorpions... then you just might want to stick to the normal "OH LOOK CUTE!" Nintendo games.

Do you consider yourself a leet haxxor with nothing better to do today? Good.

The Resident Evil 5 Demo Is released in Japan but not the US yet...HOWEVER! If you are feeling froggy, jump on this: this link to Planet Xbox 360 has a detailed explanation on how to get access to the demo.

Some trickery and skill is involved, so if you're too hungover or hungry or lazy you might want to forget it. But otherwise, you can satisfy your burning desire to play the RE5 demo today. 

Xbox Live Silver members... this news will make you reminisce of Christmas morning! A glorious time when a gift was given to you that made you tingle all over in excitement!

Microsoft is calling this month a "Friendship is Free" month. For a complete month you will get a taste of some multiplayer action, even though you have not paid for Xbox Live Gold! The games you will have access to are A Kingdom for Keflings, Aegis Wing, Bomberman Live, Hardwood Hearts, Hardwood Spades, UNO, Small Arms and Super Street Fighter II Turbo HD Remix.

I know, being able to play these games multiplayer is like getting a broken down Ferrari... but hey, would you rather have a broken Ferrari or none at all?

Enjoy, children.

Patching seems to be all the rage today.

EA Los Angeles released patch 1.05 for Command and Conquer: Red Alert 3; this is the first major patch for the RTS and it might be a good idea to update your game. The update is going to include a DRM De-authorization Tool.

WTF is that, you ask? According to an official statement, "This easy-to-use tool allows gamers to de-authorize previously authenticated machines so they ultimately have the freedom to play Red Alert 3 on an unlimited number of PCs." This sounds cool but it sounds like what most people do anyway... unless that is illegal.

Another big feature included in the patch is the new map-making tool. You can create your own maps and players get "full creative control and all the tools they will need to make the ultimate Red Alert 3 skirmish or multiplayer map." Of course, the patch also fixes some bugs, glitches, et cetera.

If you want to download the patch (and you should) just go to the red alert website. Happy gamimg!

Valve is patching up its fantastical zombie survival horror, Left 4 Dead. Nothing major is being changed; mostly Valve is aiming to fix little bugs that cropped up with this update. Restarting the Steam Client will start the update. Here is a list of what you might see:

Finding a dedicated server when starting the game from a lobby is now faster and more reliable

Versus mode is now locked to Normal difficulty

Difficulty on a server is now locked to the one set by the lobby reservation

Fixed lagouts/spikes after level transition

Fixed directory issue with spray logs in some cases

Fixed video settings not saving after closing video options dialog

Corrected a boomer suicide exploit

Several minor localization fixes

Fixed disabling cheats incorrectly resetting data

On the Kojima Productions website, a little teaser appeared referencing the "next Metal Gear." The unfortunate thing about the teaser is that it is some sort of inside joke or code; in the image above you can see the "formula."

An exclamation point, plus a Spanish exclamation point equals a power symbol? Eh, I'm no good at puzzles or deciphering cryptic messages like that. I do want to note that this message is entirely in "Xbox 360 green" and the power symbol is used on the 360.

So does it mean excitement plus excitement equals... 360 Gears of War 4??

So this is WiiSpeak (puppy not included). Since the Japanese have been experiencing the WiiSpeak Channel all day, now we North Americans (or Europeans) have a chance to see what it will be like. So. Cool.

The screen above features the photo sharing aspect of the channel; while you're chatting to a buddy you can load up your SD card and share photos. Apparently whoever was chatting then wanted to share a photo of their anemic, albeit cute, puppy.

If you were so keen so notice , the Channel's voice message function is in the picture as well. This function allows players to record 10 second (ish) messages and post them on the Message Board to Wii friends (with and without the WiiSpeak Channel).

I can't wait for my very own WiiSpeak Channel; I'll upload puppeh photos all day.

EA is finally going to do something with the NASCAR license it has; early next year, the Wii will be getting a cute version of NASCAR (aka: minus the rednecks). NASCAR Kart Racing, or NASKART, will include 14 different licensed NASCAR drivers and 10 fictitious drivers. Each cute-as-a-button driver will have special capabilities that will help them win the race.

Up to four racers can play squashed together on a split screen, but that's just a recipe for chaotic fun. The races will be on 24 different tracks, including IRL places and made-up, wild tracks. Starting February 10, NASCAR Kart Racing will be on sale. Rev your engines, kiddies!

The commercials alone for Mirror's Edge make my palms sweaty and heart racy. Competitively participating in Mirror's Edge time trials would kill me, but I can see the attraction to them. Running, jumping, sliding and other parkouring all over the place would be extremely fun when given a buttload of new levels to complete them on. EA and DICE are planning on getting some adrenaline pumping in your veins with a new set of maps for Mirror's Edge time trial s.

The "Pure Time Trial Map Pack" for PlayStation 3, Xbox 360 and PC will most likely be released in late January if all goes according to plan; it will add nine races on seven stages (and the screenshots of said stages look absolutely beautiful and palm-sweat inducing).

If you have the $10/800 MSP to spare, make sure to keep an eye out for this pack in January. Important note: PS3 Mirror's Edge gamers will be able to download an additional map for free.

If you own Lips (the Xbox 360 game, not the things on your face) then you'll be happy to hear that there is going to be some Yule tide DLC. Starting December 5, you can get your Christmas on during Lips gameplay starting at $2 (160 MSP).

Or, you could just frequent your local Panera Bread to hear literally all of these sounds blasted into your ears while you try to enjoy your low-fat strawberry smoothie. Your choice.

Friday, Dec. 5

Blue Christmas - Elvis Presley

The Dreidel Song - Sister Hazel

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year - Andy Williams

Friday, Dec.12

Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer - Gene Autry

Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree - Brenda Lee

A Holly Jolly Christmas - Burl Ives

The Christmas Song (Merry Christmas To You) - Nat King Cole

Santa Baby - Kylie Minogue

White Christmas - Bing Crosby

Hanukkah Blessings - Barenaked Ladies

My Rock Band 2 drum set has not all of its holes filled. Surprisingly, I'm not happy about this. The space for a jack in between the orange kick pedal and the multicolored pads  is staring at me like an ungodly, demonic eye. WHAT ARE YOU?

Harmonix has lied and omitted a little regarding the little, lonely hole. At first they explained it was an expansion port for a second kick pedal...but that apparently just isn't true. What a tease you are, Harmonix. According to a review guide sent to OXM UK, "It was stated in prior interviews/demos that this input was a jack for the second kick pedal, which is not the case."

The lies and confusion go on to say that Harmonix "has not revealed the functionality for this input," and said functionality "be announced at a later date, along with further details for double-kick functionality."

So here is a timeline of the lonely hole:

1. It is a port for a second kick pedal.

2. It is not.

3. It is a port for something, but I'm not telling you what.

4. It will be a port for something special, maybe a kick pedal, maybe not. Haven't decided.

The Japanese have all of the luck when it comes to release dates, it seems. The Wii Speak Channel is up and running now for Japan-only Wii owners. Don't worry though, a North American version IS going to be available (unlike the Japan-only Wii fortune telling channel).

The free WiiSpeak Channel will allow WiiSpeak users to chat with each other, trade pictures off of SD cards, make voice tone adjustments and mute certain parties. You'll be able to display 6 of your Miis on the channel to represent yourself and other parts of your family, friends, et cetera. If you're lucky like me, you won't even have 4 people as Miis on your Wii because you're so lonely... so there will be plenty of room on the WiiSpeak Channel.

There is a catch to this "free" channel, though. You must own the Animal Crossing WiiSpeak sets or the solo WiiSpeak peripheral in order to receive a download ticket for the channel. If you bought a used WiiSpeak you can request a ticket from Nintendo; they're simply limiting the channel to those who can actually use it. This makes sense to me.

Even if you won't own a WiiSpeak peripheral, you can take advantage of some of its features. People with WiiSpeak can record and send 10 second messages to people with or without the microphone peripheral and channel.

I have a feeling my 4 friends with Wiis will be getting some late-night, drunk, WiiSpeak recordings.

Don't worry; your New Xbox Experience avatar won't be chilly in the winter months. It looks like there will be some updates to the clothes available for your little person.

The Spotlight ad shows some snappy ski and snowboard clothes; although the picture shows the new clothes as being available now, it might take a little while for the puffy jackets to show up on your own Xbox 360.

So keep an eye out in your New Xbox Experience dashboard; the winter gear will be heading your avatar's way soon.

Now that there is a good Cursed Mountain trailer out...there is something to be said for it.

The singular standout thing that I noticed from this new Cursed Mountain trailer is that the graphics look damn good. I really got to hand it to Deep Silver and Nintendo... this is going to be one sexy beast of a game on the surface.

The "Athena" game engine used for Cursed Mountain is doing wonders for the Wii title. The engine includes HDR-Rendering, shader simulations, an ultra-fast particle system, soft particles, depth of field, motion blur, dynamic soft shadows, spherical harmonics lighting, as well as a high performance level-of-detail and streaming system.

If more titles can jump in the "make the Wii look good" bandwagon, more serious gamers can really latch on to the Wii. As for the story behind the pretty, snow-filled trailer:

The storyline revolves around a very high mountain, Buddhist monks, a half-dead brother, ghosts, villains with pointy hats and snow. 

Me so sad! Today and Tomorrow's Lucky Fortune Telling Channel is forever destined to stay a Japan-only channel. How am I going to live without in depth fortune tellings in complete Engrish for several of my Miis?

"There are no current plans to bring this to Europe," a Nintendo spokesperson claimed. At this point we are not sure if Today and Tomorrow's Lucky Fortune Telling Channel is responsible for instructing Nintendo to keep the channel out of Europe.

Technically, the TaTLFT Channel could still be seen in the US, but I wouldn't get your hopes up. ... Not that you'd really want this convoluted channel clogging up your Wii home anyway.

Are you interested the new Fable II DLC, Knothole Island? Well it is my pleasures to introduce you to the winter wonderland via 3 screenshots. Note both the awesome winter landscape and kinky, leather, biker outfit.

You should expect to see this DLC in mid-December, but there are no guarantees on that. Remember that if you want to experience Knothole Island without the quests or multiplayer options, you can always download a free update when it's available.

In honor of spring, Gardening Mama will be released for the Nintendo DS in Spring 2009. Majestco, possibly because of a recent attack by PETA on their habit of killing virtual animals for food, is now turning DS gamers loose into the garden. Kiddies around the world will be able to cultivate and grow their very own plants, flowers and vegetables.

It will be great to see Mama in a setting other than a kitchen; as a woman I was starting feel a little offended that Mama wasn't allowed to be in any other room of the house. But then again, I might just be offended because I have short haircut and penis envy.

Square Enix and Disney Interactive Studios confirmed today that Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days, otherwise known as the Square Enix game with the most confusing title, would be coming to North America (and that is a pretty impressive statement, seeing that their titles are usually 5 words long at least).

358/2 Days occurs between the events of Kingdom Hearts and Kingdom Hearts 2. You will be tagging along with Roxas as he has quite a number of adventures that involve a Square Enix look and Disney characters alike. 358/2 Days will also let up to 4 players join up and play in a multiplayer mode via their DS systems.

There is not a definite North American release for 358/2 Days, but the DS game is going to be released in February in Japan... so hopefully we'll hear some news of an American release soon after.

Think back to September, a golden time before the public acceptance of the economic recession and a time when we were all so engrossed in the Presidential race we forgot to feed our children and hamsters. In this September, Microsoft dropped massive price cuts on its line of Xbox 360s; the most impressive being the Xbox 360 Arcade unit price cut to $199.

Lowering the price of an Xbox 360 to less than a Nintendo Wii is a smart move, even if the specific model doesn't have a hard drive. In order to entice more shoppers this holiday season, MS is now going to include a 256MB internal memory unit with all new Xbox 360 Arcades.

What would this mean to a layperson? Well, for one, you won't need a memory card to download the New Xbox Experience.

Some cat from the house of MS claims, "We can confirm that we are moving to internal memory for the Xbox 360 Arcade. The physical internal memory is the same size as the previous external memory units--256MB."

On the flip side, this might be bad news if you often used the removable memory with your Xbox 360 Arcade; it is useful to have if you feel like popping over to a friend's house for an afternoon of gaming.

The budget pricing of the Xbox 360 Arcade is even more fantastic now; what are you waiting for? It's not like you have to save your money or anything.

Are you a directing movie whiz and are just waiting to unleash your genius? If you're also a gamer who adores EA's Spore, you're SO in luck. (Just kidding about the Sporn, keep it clean kiddies!)

Electronic Arts' Wright Stuff Spore Movie Contest deadline has been extended until December 5. The down-low on this contest is that you need to make a Spore fan-made movie and submit it to Spike.com. By doing so, you're entered into the contest to win a chance to go to the VGAs.

There will be a multitude of judges selecting the winning movie (one of said judges being Will Wright himself). Good luck, aspiring movie-makers!

For those of you that don't know, a theremin is a musical instrument that is played by adjusting the proximity of your hands to two different antennae. It was created a long time ago about some Russian with the last name of Theremin and that's all you really need to know regarding the history. Here is a picture to get the idea.

Now, I have something really cool to tell you. Some guy named Ken Moore made his Wiimote into a theremin. It is by far the most badass hack I have ever seen. Who cares about console case mods and whatnot... this man can play music. With his Wiimote and nothing else.

Sidenote: I have no idea if this really sounds like the Star Trek theme and YES, it does look like he is fingerbanging the air.

The Monsters vs. Aliens movie being created by Dreamworks is already planned to be adapted into a game for all major platforms. Dreamworks really doesn't waste time planning ways to make money off of their ridiculously popular films; the movie doesn't even come out until next year!

The game is probably going to be released sometime in March of 2009 and the company Beenox Inc. will be developing it. As you can imagine, the game will feature various cute monsters and aliens that you will be able to play as. Expect to see some co-op gameplay and various characters you can play as.

The Chronicles of Riddick: Escape from Butcher Bay is going to make a badass comeback thanks to Atari and the addition of some new hi-def levels. The new "Dark Athena" levels have been expanded into a beautiful, new 10+ hour campaign. Dark Athena isn't just additional gameplay either; there will be an inclusion of new game mechanics and full-game production values.  

The Chronicles of Riddick: Assault on Dark Athena & Escape from Butcher's Bay are going to look completely beautiful in hi-def and both will have the new features and gameplay mechanics included; the release is set for spring of 2009.

I can't wait... I completely forgot how sexy Riddick is. I've been a bad merc Riddick..punish me!

(He is on the right.)

Next spring, US gamers can play Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: Echoes of Time on their Nintendo Wii and DS. Not only that, but Wii gamers and DS gamers can play together... !

FFCC:EoT is made to be played cooperatively, even if the friends are playing from two different platforms. This is a great feature that I think all games should have. I am unfortunate enough to have Left 4 Dead for the Xbox 360 but cannot play with my PC gaming brethren.

In Crystal Chronicles: Echoes of time the story will revolve around a feminine, yet attractive, male who must venture out from his comfort zone and find a cure for a mysterious illness. The usual.

Uh oh Harry Potter fans... You better get reading to hold onto your Sorting Hat! It sounds like the next LEGO video game will be Harry Potter themed. Merlin's pants!

Once I get to the Department of Mysteries to confirm this prophecy, I'll let you know if this LEGO Harry Potter will be the fifth installment in the LEGO game series.  Just to refresh your memory, the LEGO games are these: LEGO Star Wars: The Video Game, LEGO Star Wars II: The Original Trilogy, LEGO Indiana Jones: The Original Adventures, and LEGO Batman: The Videogame.

I'll be happy to hear of any new Harry Potter game, movie, book or other merchandise; the thought of a LEGO Snape gives me a girl boner.

This is a generally known fact: hamsters are awesome. They are small, furry and cute. They stuff things into their cheeks and run way too fast on their wheels, causing them to flip. Adorable.

Finally, a game publisher jumped onto the "Hamsters are Cute" bandwagon. There will be a Hamster Channel for the PSP; in the channel you can interact with a variety of virtual hamsters in various settings. I'm hoping to see "Russian Dwarf Hamsters in Paris," but then again I'm nothing but a silly romantic.

The hammies are generated using random generation routines so that each one is uniquely different for all players.

The Hamster Channel is a download-only PSP title and will be in the Japanese PSN in mid-December. But no worries my furries! The title is planning to be an international download-only PSP very soon.

The Wii isn't just all about rainbows, Zelda and Cooking Mama. Oh no. It's tough.

Oddly enough, a production company by the name of Rainbow studios is making a game called Deadly Creatures. The game is about the lives and adventures of a tarantula and a scorpion; but don't be deceived, this isn't a Disney bug story. This is a "watch the tarantula kill a deadly scorpion and shit bricks" story.

Unfortunately, THQ confirmed that the game will be delayed; Deadly Creatures will be pushed back to February 2009. This is the second delay for the game; it was originally planned to be released on October 31, but then got pushed back until December. I hear the scorpion is giving the studio a lot of flak regarding royalties of its autobiography described in the game.

Let's get something straight: I think that Wii Music is a piece of crap. I could turn to a child, hand him a pinecone and say "pretend to play the ass flute." I would therefore save a few hundred bucks; a Wii and a game disc is not necessary for imaginary strumming or flutery.

Thankfully, most humans agree with me and as a result Wii Music hasn't been selling too well. In some sort of disillusioned fit, Miyamoto declared that the game could still do well. "I think a very large audience can enjoy Wii Music."

I'm sorry, Miyamoto, but at least the Guitar Hero atrocities have itty bitty guitars you can pretend to play music on and hit your kid sister with in the head. Miyamoto still has hope that the gaming world will catch onto Wii Music and it'll be something "big."

Maybe it'll be on a big sales rack after Christmas 2008.

Rare studio is like a guy I liked back in my junior year of high school. He always said that he was totally into me and loved my cans, yet when the weekend rolled around he never called. Rare's head Mark Betteridge told Eurogamer that they have been kicking around the idea of bringing back Killer Instinct in some way, but wanted it to be unique and not something that would cause them to be ashamed for all eternity.

If Rare ever gets off its ass and makes a new Killer Instinct, I hope that it does the original justice. We wouldn't want some crummy game forever ruining the KI legend. "Killer Instinct is an IP that is fondly remembered and we may do something with it," Betteridge admitted, "but it's a tricky market to be like the old Killer Instinct."

Midway might have some sort of syndrome or lupus or something; they have begun hyping up a game that (wait for it!) has not been announced and does not exist yet. It's actually a pretty smart maneuver since we can't say that their invisible, intangible, non-idea is crap and have to wait until 2010 when the video game actually will exist. Then we can say it sucks.

The kicker of the entire "hyping a nonexistent game" strategy was when Midway creative director Simon Woodroffe compared this secret project to Gears of War 2, saying that it will be as good as or better than the Marcus Fenix masterpiece. Mr. Woodroffe, I don't think the comparison is valid. It's like giving birth to a child in a dank basement and then saying it's the best one there is, without realizing that there are other tots out there with only 2 legs and a fully formed brain. You have nothing to compare Gears of War 2 to.

So congrats, Midway, on essentially saying nothing. I hope when the time comes your game is a beautiful work of art dipped in chocolate... although I doubt it will be.

Watching the 25 ways to die in Gears of War 2 makes my life seem a little brighter; no, I may not be able to pay for a college education but DAMN IT at least I'm not getting a torque arrow up my ass.

There may be some spoilers here and there throughout the video, but if you don't really mind then carry on. Seeing Marcus get chomped on by a massive frog-fish-monster is just sweet. Just think, if you're bad enough at Gears of War 2 you might just be able to see these 25 deaths and more. Luck you!

Oh I hope Capcom is serious about making Sackboy and Sackgirl versions of Chun-Li, Guile, Zangief and Ryu. It is rumore... ... are those Sackgirl tits?

PSNow, a Spanish PlayStation community site, somehow found these leaked LBP pictures; hopefully it is a taste of what is to come to the PSN. There have been hints of Capcom dropping  a LBP surprise sometime in the near future and these Street Fighter costumes are just the ticket.

So c'mon Capcom and give us the good news already! I need something to perk me up; I just spent all of my tuition money on two-for-$30 video game Cyber Monday sales.

Now, didn't you think it was unfair that Space Invaders always got shot down on their way to Earth? After all, they could have been coming down to offer us tasty treats.

Space Invaders Get Even, a 1 player downloadable game for 500 Wii Points, is a sweet twist on the old game. You get to destroy an entire city as these cute little alien invaders; essentially, you are paying those douchebags back who shot you down over ten years ago.

Revenge is sweet. Check out this WiiWare ASAP, it might just be fun.

It's about time that Half-Life fans get a revamped edition of the original to play (are you listening, Square Enix?). Granted, this is fan-made and Valve isn't behind this project yet, but I think they should consider it.

Sometime in 2009, Black Mesa will give the game a completely face-lift, including modern technology and production values. As you can see from the end of the trailer above, the project was originally called Black Mesa Source. Valve put a stop to those shenanigans and requested a name change so that consumers don't confuse it with an official Valve project.

The trailer for this game is downright beautiful; it stays true to the storyline and the new textures make me think it is Christmas; not only is it pretty, but there is an addition of multiplayer modes so that there can be some Gordon on Gordon action.

You won't need Half-Life: Source to play Black Mesa. As long as you have any Source Engine game on your PC, you can download and play this conversion any time you want. Some examples of Source Engine games are: Counter-Strike: Source, Day of Defeat: Source, Half-Life: Source, Half-Life 2, Half-Life 2 Episodes (One, Two and Three), Half-Life 2: Deathmatch, Portal, Team Fortress 2 and Left 4 Dead.

If you're feeling a bit concernicus during this holiday season regarding the Wii Speak and the Wii Speak Channel, I hope to relieve your geeky worries. If you're planning on saving some money by buying a pre-owned Wii Speak microphone, you won't have to worry about being without a Wii Download Ticket.

According to someone with some sort of authority, we hope, at Nintendo:

"Any consumer who requires a Wii Download Ticket after purchasing a pre-owned Wii Speak Accessory may contact their local Nintendo Customer Services department, where they can request a Wii Download Ticket for the Wii Speak Channel for free."

So the Nintendo Nazis aren't as harsh as we all thought they might be... and good for them! I know I'm going to be pouring over ebay lists looking for a cheap Wii Speak.

There are still some restrictions, however. You cannot get the channel to use with the WiiSpeak on a friend's Wii and Customer Services will not give you a download ticket for use with a third-party mic.  

Finally! A Gears of War 2 patch has been released from Epic. The next time that you turn on your Xbox 360 and play Gears of War 2 while connected to Xbox Live, the update will be automatically downloaded.

The main issue that the patch was created to fix was the strange loading times and issues associated with multiplayer gaming, especially the matchmaking.

The patch will also improve how the stats are collected for GearsofWar.com. The problem where certain players could not access the campaign when Xbox Live was down is also being fixed.

Thanks, Epic! Not like these things should have been issues to begin with... 

Isn't it eerie how much a Black Friday line looks like a zombie apocalypse?

So even Xbox Live is getting in on the Black Friday action. I suppose there isn't much of BF left, but Microsoft is giving you an extra opportunity to snag some deals online.

Starting today and continuing until Sunday evening, a lot of DLC on the Xbox Live Marketplace is on sale. You only have access to these titles if you are Gold Subscription member and have some extra dough to spend.

The prices given are in MS Points; some titles have a sale for 300 MSP off... not too bad!

Australia and its Australian Classifications Board have deemed F.E.A.R. 2: Project Origin too violent. In return, I deem Australia and its ACB pussies.

According to the Aussies, Monolith's game has too much 'high violence' in its content; I personally think that this sounds like Engrish and isn't a concrete reason to ban the game from their shores. 



There is still a slight chance that the game will be released in Australia on February 11, if the developers can get the continent to think straight.

After all, their lives are based on violence. Dingoes eat their babies.

Here is a bit of news that you don't really need to know but are going to anyway because it's displayed beneath the picture of a girl's ass.

Nintendo Europe recently sent out a press release saying that it is just too awesome for color (or colour) and is dumping the red logo and adopting a grab, gray version. Oh how cold hearted you are.

Apparently the change was official 2 years ago, but it's just now floating around in cyberspace so I thought I should bring it up. I personally feel that gray is just a little too business-like for a video game company... why not just adopt the above logo?

Destroy All Humans! Path of the Furon is several things.

1. A lame alien game

2. Something found in a bargain bin

3. A game with a stupid title

One thing it is not, however, is coming to the PlayStation3. The game is being yanked from the PS3 queue, according to THQ. The game was experiencing "development issues." I can only assume that in this case development issues means "sucks a whole lot-itits." Many a game suffer from this disease and it is a tragedy.

Too Human, the wonderful Norse slash RPG slash space marine fun that it was, had one extra element of awesome that I usually forgot about. In the background, while I just wiggled around my thumbstick for an hour to kill a horde of baddies, there was a delightful soundtrack playing. What is metal? Classical? Techno?

I have no idea how to classify it, but I do know that it's going to be in stores for your listening pleasure.

You can buy the CD for $16 from Amazon, Best Buy, iTunes and the CD label Sumthing Distribution's own site. The only possible downside I could think to buying this music is that you'll be constantly reminded of the millions of times you sat screaming at Baldur for dying amongst a mass of monsters.

Disney sure is busy today. Not only did they release a Club Penguin game for the Nintendo DS, but they also released Ultimate Band. UB is basically a rip-off of other rhythm matching games like Guitar Hero and Rock Band, but I suppose I can forgive them for wanting to cash in on something that is profitable.

You can play single-player or multi-player in UB with a list of (supposedly) popular songs. Thankfully, you will only need to use the Wiimote or DS stylus to play the game. I'm not entirely sure how jamming on a guitar will feel with only a Wiimote in hand, but at least you don't have to drop an extra $30+ on a Wii guitar.

One thing I can say in defense of Ultimate Band, it does have a neat song-writing feature. It will allow you to lay down the guitar, bass, drums, et cetera for a original tune and put it all together (if you're that talented, that is).  

Ultimate Band will provide ample amounts of customization; you can control your band's look, style, attitude, performance, skills, and more. UB's unique constellation of customization makes it identifiable and distinguishable from Guitar Hero and Rock Band, but it will have trouble gaining steam. 

As you progress through your virtual career, you encounter more bonuses and option in the form of unlocked songs, venues, and accessories. Also, down the road you can add a fifth player known as an Effects DJ.

Ultimate Band has an MSRP is $29.99 for Nintendo DS and $49.99 for Wii.

Do you have a little tyke who has more money than me and owns a DS while I do not?

Well now the little brat can play Club Penguin adventures through their DS and not just the internet. Club Penguin: Elite Penguin Force video game from Disney is in stores today.

If you're not keeping up with kiddie games, here is the down load on Club Penguin. Someone made a social gaming site for kids and called it club penguin and let everyone have their own penguin avatar. It has a lot of cuteness, ingenuity and penguins. Obviously.

In Club Penguin: Elite Penguin Force for Nintendo DS, you play as some penguin agent who has access to really neat gadgets and gizmos and you need to save the world in one way or another. Basically, it's an adventure game that you'll play as a penguin...that's all you need to know.

One neat thing about this penguin DS game is that you can earn coins to put towards your online account; all you need to do is upload the coins you earn wirelessly to your avatar. Each game you buy will also be included with a special code that will give you VIP access to an EPF Command Room online. (www.ClubPenguin.com).

Oh, flock.

And I'm not trying to swear in a cute way. Flock, the amazingly awesome sheep-based puzzle downloadable game, is almost here. Unless the game gets delayed, it should be available in January. Puzzles and sheep are how I always combat the post-holiday blues.

The games will be available for XBLA, PSN and PC... although the pricing situation is a little wooly. It shouldn't be too expensive though, seeing that it is a downloadable game and features sheep.

Baa.

Since I am not an economist I cannot possibly explain in detail why this makes sense, but because of the bad economy it is possible that Xbox 360 sales will be on the rise. ... completely counterintuitive, I know.

From the mouths of Microsoft and Strategy Analytics, "in tough economic times, home entertainment products traditionally do well." It could be that an entire household is looking for some entertainment this Christmas and it would benefit them all just to buy one Xbox 360 instead of cough medicine for little Jimmy. Now that the entry level console for the Xbox 360 (the Arcade) is cheaper than a Nintendo Wii, I can see where the appeal is.

If you're strapped for cash this holiday, I would suggest instead of spending hundreds on gifts and video games, saving it or investing it in something useful. Or paying bills, that's good, too.

The PS3 Firmware 2.53 is supposedly being released today and although I'm not quite sure what it does, it will probably be fantastical.

One thing that will probably be included in this firmware update is some sexy full screen support for Adobe Flash content. It'd be nice if they included something else in the update... like naked pictures of Katy Perry or a coupon for a Blackberry Storm.

Forget the holidays; the Resident Evil 5 demo will be available this winter! Families are overrated, anyway.

A recent article in Famitsu states that Xbox 360 owners can download a demo for Capcom's Resident Evil 5 via Xbox Live Marketplace on December 5th. Will I be spending the majority of December running through a virtual African forest filled to the brim with flesh-hungry zombies? Duh.

The offline and co-op demo has yet to be officially confirmed for areas outside of Japan, but I cannot think of any reasons why we in the States wouldn't be able to have access.

Unless the Cloverfield monster is up to shenaniganz in the deep sea and is munching on internet wires.

So another heroine went from "kicks ass in a flash" to "flashes tits."

The Mirror's Edge protagonist Faith has a new body that has been floating around the internet; has anyone else noticed that she is suddenly a double d, has round eyes, and lacks a certain tattoo on her face? I feel thoroughly disappointed.

I liked the fact that Faith was a small, realistic Asian chick who could kick major ass while running around on rooftops in the future.

One of the game's producers, Tom Farrer, told MTV: "We really wanted to get away from the typical portrayal of women in games, that they're all just kind of tits and ass in a steel bikini. We wanted her to look athletic and fit and strong [enough] that she could do the things that she's doing."

It looks as if someone has given up on Faith... now she is all tits and ass.